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I can see that you are a thinker and that's a good thing. When you say "I have sought and not found" what specifically did you seek? Did you seek God himself, the person of God? That's what I was referring to. I can definitely tell you from my own journey that it is impossible to love someone you don't actually know. When I started reading scripture I did not know God personally. But it was through reading the Bible that I learned supernaturally who God is. Then I fell in love with him. I fell enough in love with him that I could accept the cost that came with following him, and there are many. Contrary to what some may think, Christianity isn't about butterflies and cherubs and fantasy.

There's no questioning you when you say that we are all called to take responsibility for our lives and to see things as they really are. "Truth" is the most important attribute of Christianity for me and I had a previous history of immersion into several different religions, including Mormonism, because of the diversity that is my family. That's why at some point I finally had to ask God himself, if he even existed. And when I sincerely and humbly asked, he answered. I'm not sure I really wanted to know before then but I like absolutes and wanted the certainty of knowing that what I said I believed I actually did believe. I didn't want to falsely defend a religion that I was wishy washy about.

As far as hell - it's not the party you think it's going to be. Hell is eternal separation from God and a pit of flames doesn't sound like much fun to me. Heaven is described much differently.

Would you consider reading the book of John in the Bible with a truly open mind? Or just pray and see where God leads you. He knows your heart as it is today and he's perfectly fine with you admitting your unbelief to him. Maybe you'd consider asking him to prove you wrong and then seeing what happens... I pray you'll think about joining us at the real party! :) (now there's a reason for a smiley!)

Been there, done that. I know the scriptures reasonably well and I really do appreciate many of the teachings in them. Our society wouldn't be what it is today without the Bible (I am talking about the good things).

I tried the spiritual route and found it wanting, what more can I say? I am happy for you if you have found joy in the Lord, that is a good thing. As for me, I delight in family and friends and discovering light and truth in this world, the only fear of death that I have is the sorrow that it may bring to my family and friends and the joy it may bring to my enemies : )