[AmericanInTokyo]

I can't STAND Fance for doing this. What a bunch of Bstards.

[Fintan]

WHO NEEDS THE FRENCH?

 French Military History in a Nutshell Currently making the rounds in the military community:

The Complete Military History of France

 - Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.

- Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman."

- Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

- Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots.

- Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other
 participants started ignoring her.

- War of Devolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

- The Dutch War - Tied.

 - War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

 - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.

 - American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

- French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

- The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

- The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

- World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

 - World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

- War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu.

- Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

 - War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Muslims and the Germans just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.

 The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France
 collapses?"

 Final Conclusion: "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage."


 

[Cincinatus]

Can the U.N. be saved? Is it worth saving? It appears now that, thanks to the French, both questions have been answered in the negative.

Enough with the France bashing! See this? They've done us all a great big FAVOR! Vive La France!

[WSGilcrest]

France may have destroyed the U.N. as a serious institution

And that's a bad thing?

[colorado tanker]

Well, good riddence to all that. With the U.N. buried as irrelevant, we won't have to go through this brain damage again. In a way, we should thank the French.

[kesg]

In effect, President Bush posed two questions to the world last year: Can the U.N. be saved? Is it worth saving? It appears now that, thanks to the French, both questions have been answered in the negative. It is a clarifying moment.

Hmm...if he's right here, maybe there are at least two reasons to thank the French. :)

[smith288]

« Click

[Paleo Conservative]

France may have destroyed the U.N. as a serious institution.

Surely he can't be serious. Since when have either France or the U.N. ever been serious?

[AD from SpringBay]

If the end result of the French position on Iraq is that the United Nations loses whatever facade of legitimacy it once had, then maybe we owe the French a little more gratitude. Since the democrats would never allow the US out of the UN, maybe the only way out is for the French to show the American population just how flimsy the UN really is.

[conservativecorner]

France To The UN: Drop Dead


Sorry about the mis-spelling gang!

[Billthedrill]

I note with some pleasure that Bush has tossed the problem of North Korea into the UN arena. No doubt the French will show us the proper way to deal with that one in that venue. They'll be in luck: surrender is still an open option.

[11th Earl of Mar]

France may have destroyed the U.N. as a serious institution.

If France can destroy the UN, will we still hate them?

Of course, we will.

[exDem from Miami]

>>In effect, President Bush posed two questions to the world last year: Can the U.N. be saved? Is it worth saving? It appears now that, thanks to the French, both questions have been answered in the negative. It is a clarifying moment.>>


Hmmmm, maybe we should be thanking the French.....

[PoisedWoman]

R.I.P, weasels. And good riddance.

[Cachelot]

France To UN: Drop Dead

Good idea. Drop on France.

Paris, after all, is a good place for all those turd-world gangsters :)).

[A2J]

France may have destroyed the U.N. as a serious institution.

Well, in that case, then GO FRANCE!

[uncbob]

FRance has a HUGE oil deal in with Saddam
That's what they are really worried about

[fightinJAG]

These days when I hear Powell he sound TICKED.

He worked and worked and worked to get the French to sign off on Resolution #17. He thought he had 'em.

But, no. The cheese-eating surrender monkeys are also the

FROG-LEGGED BACKSTABBERS.

They double-crossed Powell and all of us. They will pay.

[TLBSHOW]

In effect, President Bush posed two questions to the world last year: Can the U.N. be saved? Is it worth saving? It appears now that, thanks to the French, both questions have been answered in the negative. It is a clarifying moment.


THE UN IS DEAD.......Thanks France......

[Letitring]

The French want power via the EU. They want an EU army, hence NATO is out. They want to rule the EU.