Posted on 11/28/2002 5:41:45 AM PST by 68-69TonkinGulfYachtClub
GEORGE W. BUSH
I don't think I should have to answer that question.
AL GORE
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.
MARTHA STEWART
If the chicken crossed the road on my property, I would be fully justified in blocking its exit until the local authorities could arrive to arrest it for trespassing. I am a private person and should not have to be subjected to the "innocent mistakes" of common chickens.
JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what "they" call it - the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."
DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed, I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it overcame a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.
JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
VOLTAIRE
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.
RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?
KEN STARR
I intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of the President of the United States of America in an effort to distract law enforcement officials and the American public from the criminal wrongdoing our highest elected official has been trying to cover up. As a result, the chicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he cooperates fully with our investigation. Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to reach the other side of the road until our investigation and any Congressional follow-up investigations have been completed.
CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook--- and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?
LOUIS FARRAKHAN
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to Trample him and keep him down.
THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said Unto the chicken," Thou shalt cross the road" and the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
ROTFLMAO!! Somebody spent some time on this one. Good one, B4. Thanks.
Oops! LOL!
Ted's other home at Free Republic is at the current Ted Maher thread.
Ted's wife Heidi and her brother Todd are in Monaco testifying today.
We're getting reports on my stepson's son taken to the hospital today with pneumonia, special needs, special prayers.
The authors of AID AND COMFORT: Jane Fonda in North Vietnam Henry Mark Holzer and Erika Holzer have completed Fake Warriors: Identifying, Exposing, and Punishing Those Who Falsify Their Military Service in order to honor those who have truly served.
It is continually inspiring to see the service of our men and women in uniform.
We honor you with our thoughts and prayers and the display of our flag 24/7 lit dawn to dusk.
Happy Thanksgiving to you zip and to mrs zip and the ziplets. Hi Shane.
You are so right, zip, thank you to our allies too!
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
November 22, 2002
Release Number 60-02
Contact: (808) 541-2170
E-mail: Petty Officer Lauren Y. Smith
COAST GUARD MEDEVACS CRUISE SHIP PASSENGER
HONOLULU – A Coast Guard HH-65 Dolphin rescue helicopter from Coast Guard Air Station Barbers Point rendezvoused with the cruise ship Infinity 95-miles northeast of Hilo to medevac a 73-year-old man 4 p.m. Thursday after suffering a heart attack.
The patient, Cecil Brown, was transported to Hilo Memorial Hospital at 4:47 p.m. in stable condition.
This was the second medevac for the Coast Guard from a cruise ship in Hawaiian waters in three days.
A Coast Guard Helicopter medevaced a 70-year-old Kaua’i man suffering from an upper respiratory infection from the Norwegian Star to Kona Community Hospital Tuesday.
Media advisory: Video of Thursday’s medevac will be available around 12 p.m. from KITV channel 4, 535-0420. Stills are also available, please Call Petty Officer Lauren Smith for e-mailed copies.
Please help yourselves.
A special thanks
for all of our troops
serving away from home
this Thanksgiving. 
Bless you. 
Have a good Thanksgiving, Rad.
LOL! Kindergarteners and cooking. Too cute, tom!
For anyone on a special diet this day....no problem!
If you miss being in the kitchen on Thanksgiving Day, here's a fun sight with turkey shopping lists, recipes for everything from appetizers to leftovers, table setting ideas and turkey trivia: www.cookingvillage.com.
Did you know that the first meal eaten on the moon was turkey and trimmings? Mmmm...stuffing in a tube? (^:
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