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The anti-war movement in America is in full swing. They are predicting doom and gloom at the hands of Saddam Hussein. Which makes MoJo wonder whether they were around for the "spanking" that Saddam received the first time around. I'm wondering what it is about anti-war movements that make me smile. Could it be the people that are apart of the movement? Could it be the fact that they support tyrannts in power? Could it be that these people represent the worst possible experimentation into Liberal breeding that has surfaced since the idiots that produced Walter Mondale, Bill and Hillary Clinton, Phil Donahue, Paul Begala, and James Carville. If you don't want America to go to war, then you should move out of this country. These people complain that President Bush and his "cronies" (That would be any patriotic American) are trying to silence them. I'm not sure how they are being silenced, but I sure as hell can hear them and it's working MoJo's last nerve. MoJo thinks that these people must be in denial as to who started this darn war. Those religious fanatics wanted JIHAD. Well, they've got it. Stop your moaning and GET ON WITH IT!
When you send your child to school, you don't expect them to learn about early childhood development. In Texas, a teacher gave birth in her classroom in front of her class. (This is what they were saying in the papers. MoJo pretty much assumed that she gave birth in front of her students. DUH) Anyways, can you imagine the sight of that? YUCK! (Yes, it was beautiful and moving..I'm sure) "So? What did you learn at school today, Johnny? My teacher gave birth to a baby and it smelled real bad and the baby had a conehead and had blood everywhere. Um, by the way daddy..I know the stork doesn't drop babies off anymore. The stork wasn't anywhere near." Can you imagine those conversations? Mother and baby are doing well. Not sure about the students or the parents.
Our British friends seem to have a little scandal on their hands. It seems that some troops in the Falklands were enjoying some "rest, recreation, procreation, and alcohol". While you are serving our country in probably a very boring manner, here's what they were doing: First, there was a civilian female worker that offered sex services to the troops. (Gives new meaning to GIVING YOUR ALL FOR YOUR COUNTRY). Second, a helicopter crewman "hung" naked from the back of a low-flying Chinook and flashed the women below. (All this for free! What a guy!) Third, The Royal Air Force Diva's stripped for topless photos and did some nice lap dancing in their undies. (Our Air Force women sure aren't that much fun, huh guys? LOL). Fourth, they decided that the new guys and gals arriving had to take part in a drinking intiation. (This bud's for you, you, and you) So? If you think America needs to send more troops anywhere, how about lobbying for the Falklands? Of course, someone will be sent down there to do a full investigation. I'm wondering if he/she is going to request that they demonstrate exactly what happened? Wouldn't that be a logical way of figuring out what did or didn't happen. MoJo would like to be invited to make sure the helicopter crewman does it exactly the same way again. (It is a sacrifice I'm willing to make for our country and our allies)
When you can't catch a sniper, what would be the most logical thing for you to do?? Exactly! Call a psychic. (MoJo knows you anwered the question correctly! I sure did..NOT) Anyways, it seems that while the overpaid pundits, journalists, former police chiefs, profilers, and everyone under the sun assumed that he was a white guy. This psychic knew it from the beginning. (Hindsight is 20/20 and so is knowing what the sniper looks like after the fact) Anyways, she is so good at it that Elizabeth Baron made Larry King. And she didn't waste any taxpayer money for the "psychic channeling". So? Bravo for that! However, in the future WATCH OUT. She'll be rolling in the dough.
First, it was The Osbourne's and then it was Anna Nicole Smith. Now, it's going to be David Gest (Yikes) and his wife, Liza Minnelli getting a "reality show based on their lives". (MoJo knows you are all anxious to demand that the Armed Forces Channel carry this show immediately.) It seems that every celebrity that is bored, has too much money, or thinks that we really want to know what is going on in their lives..should have a television show. So? What will we see? Here's what Gest describes: "People will see how Liza and I are really like when we aren't in front of the camera". MoJo thinks this is rather disingenious. After all, THEY WILL HAVE CAMERAS following them everywhere. (Please for the children's sake..don't show Gest or Liza in a night gown. I don't think I could take it) Also, WHO THE HELL CARES ABOUT GEST OR LIZA? Nobody!! People cared more about Oprah being fat, going thin, getting fat again. That's what mindless television is supposed to be. It's not to help add some spice to a marriage that many think is between a homosexual and a fat Judy Garland. Please. MoJo thinks that they will be doing a reality show with Danny Devito and Rhea Pearlman soon. Do you see what a bad trend this is? UGH! STOP THE MADNESS!! \ The "JACKASS"AWARD goes today to the entire crowd, politicians, and partisan Union members that were on full display last night at Senator Paul Wellstone's " memorial service". Most memorial services are moving, quiet, or atleast in celebration of the honored dead. Last night, they displayed more of a "Pep Rally" with only the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders missing. It was disgusting. It was more like a campaign rally. And to make matters worse: Vice President, Dick Cheney, was not invited for "security reasons". The Wellstone family decided that it would be too inconvenient to have the Vice President there because of all the security detail that would force their "mourners" to be inconvenienced. Well, we all know now that it was merely because they wanted to bash the Republicans. It was the most childish event known to man. Even at high school pep rallies, the students behave better than these grown "mourners". It is appalling to think that you serve America and you would defend even these idiots with your own life. That's what brought this whole incident to a reality check. They didn't care about security reasons because of all the other dang politicians that had to get face time in front of the camera. Of course, there was no mourning that could be seen. Although, Bill having to hold Hillary's hand was probably the closest thing or person to mourning at the event. It was disgraceful and lacked the class that you would expect at a memorial serive. However, this is the Democratic National Party. It's truly the party of Jackasses. Congratulations! You've been honored with your party's own award today. (MoJo thinks this is yet another good reason to NEVER vote for a damn Democrat again.) NEWSFLASH!!! The Canadian government has issued a warning to travelers to steer clear of America. Don't you love Canada? (MoJo loves our fellow Canadian Freepers) Anyways, if you are Syrian or Iraqi then they are advising that you steer clear of traveling to America. THANK YOU, CANADA! You've done us a huge favor. Whether your government realizes it or not!!
WOOHOO Can you say "Charlize Theron"? She needs some help with her dress code. The chick is having issues? How about you help her out?? Thank you for enduring the babbling of MoJo Thank You
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OFF THE PRESS!
