[mrs9x]

Another one for the NAACP:

I pledge allegiance,
to the gang colors,
of the NAACP,
and to the racism,
for which it stands,
one hood,
under Kweisi Mfume,
with welfare benefits,
and slave reparations,
for all.

[Sweet_Sunflower29]

with welfare benefits...

Wait...Speaking as one never receiving a welfare handout...er, benefit, I'm offended.

I demand all welfare to cease at once, so my children don't feel different

:*) Good Post.

[Paul Atreides]

For Dims:

I pledge allegiance,
to the Clintons,
of the Clinton Party of America,
and to the corruption,
for which they stand,
one evil,
under Democrats,
with tyranny,
and socialism,
for all.

[B-Chan]

THE ATHEIST / MATERIALIST / OBJECTIVIST PLEDGE

I pledge allegiance to myself,
the united atoms of Me,
and to the self-awareness* which they support:
one will,
beholden to none but my own desires,
and to hell with the rest of you losers.

* strict materialists, please substitute "illusory self-awareness" here.

[gitmogrunt]

I pledge allegiance to the flag

of atheistic socialism and to the totalitarian lies,

for which it stands,one nation under culutral

diversity,balkanized and seperate constituent groups for

all.

[Nathan Jr.]

The militant lesbian pledge:

I pledge allegiance
to the leaders
of the National Organization for Women
And to my vagina
which empowers me,
one sisterhood
encompassing all sexual orientations,
with comfortable shoes
and butch haircuts for all.

[bsaunders]

I pledge allegiace to the flag of the Socialist States of Oceanna, and to the commune for which it stands, one collective, under Big Brother, with telescreens and Soma for all.

[TrappedInLiberalHell]

I pledge allegiance to the Hag
Of the United Hates of America
And to the repugnant (for 'witch' she stands)
Damnation, ungodly, indefensible
With Hillary's pantsuits for all

[BlazingArizona]

I pledge allegiance to the Hammer and Sickle Banner, and to the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals for which it stands, forcing us to be one Nation under government, divided by gender, race, class, poiltics, sexual orientation, smoking preference, weight, wastewater usage, and income, with taxation and wacky court decisions for all.

[tsomer]

I generally consent and agree to adhere
that as I reside in this place over here:

that the thing out there that flaps in the breeze
is the symbol of fauna and mountains and trees

that while the buraucrats manage this stuff
I won't make no trouble or give 'em no guff

There's bunches of people with whom I reside
We're all just one family--same color inside

Diverse as we are, we'll all get along
as long as nobody don't do no one wrong

In rational self interest, united are we
in fairness and tolerance and e-quall-i tee!

[NeoCaveman]

The Undecided Voter Pleadge

I pledge, well pledge is kind of a strong word
I'll try to pledge allegiance, well allegiance might be a bit much
To the flag, not like I own one
Of the United States of America, as long as we have coalition support
And to the republic, err democracy, for which it stands
Stands sounds so strident how about wobbles?
One nation, under the diety of your choosing or none see if I care
Indivisable, but subject to being given back to any people with grieveances
With liberty, nah security, and justice meaning more security for all.

[Tancred]

Here's one for the male homosexuals (meant to be funny, not to offend)

I pledge allegiance,
to the fag,
of the United Queers
of America,
and to the bath-house,
for which we fornicate,
one nation,
under the penis,
lubricated,
with sodomy and oral sex
for all.

[Antoninus]

I pledge allegiance to the f@g
of the United States of Gommorah,
And to my domestic partner
and all his glands,
Two buggers under each other, indivisible,
With feces and gerbils for all.

[0scill8r]

get the t-shirt here:

http://www.cafepress.com/under g