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In our case, we have asked two people if they would act as executor/trustee. We asked that they think carefully about the request before making a decision and if they agreed, and later could not fulfill the obligation to let us know so we can make changes. How much an executor gets paid for services is up to the individual making the trusts or will or what ever instrument they elect. Not everyone is wealthy and has a great deal while others have complicated estates. After seeing first hand what happened to a family friend and that family relations problems that developed later coupled with what happened with my aunt and uncle's estate and my own parents, I firmly think that there is too much opportunity for problems, not the least of which is hiding written instructions which are included but not necessarily notorized.. how does one know if that sort of document is withheld? My brother happens to be a lawyer who was the one who advised and took care of my parents trusts. Everything was held close to his vest despite the fact that my dad told me I was to have a copy and there were " to be no arrguements" whatever that meant at the time I did not know/ It puzzled me. Years laTer I found out!!! While statements and accounts were prepared fully, there were things that were done which I feel should not have been done. True, it was the parents estate and they can do as they choose but when there is the appearance that influence was used....it leave questions and hard feelings. It is too detailed to go into here but because of this, I have taken my brother out of the postition of executor of our estate and a good friend who is also a lawyer, has agreed to do the honor for us.

Thanks to all who posted a response or sent mail. I learned alot and hope all of you did too.

That is a problem, because a lot of relatives don't follow the wishes(will)of the deceased.