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Carnal Knowledge (Man has sex with deer - outstanding lawyer comes up with excellent defense)
The Wall Street Journal ^
| November 17, 2006
| James Taranto
Posted on 11/17/2006 1:48:28 PM PST by Zakeet
A Minnesota man is charged with having his way with a deer, but he claims it was just venison, the Superior Daily Telegram reports:
Bryan James Hathaway, 20, of Superior faces a misdemeanor charge of sexual gratification with an animal. He is accused of having sex with a dead deer he saw beside Stinson Avenue on Oct. 11.
A motion filed last week by his attorney, public defender Fredric Anderson, argued that because the deer was dead, it was not considered an animal and the charge should be dismissed.
The Smoking Gun has Hathaway's mug shot and a copy of the complaint, which states:
Defining animal to include carcasses would lead to absurd results. At what point of decompose would the carcass cease being an animal? Would picked-over skeletal remains still meet the definition? At death, an animal ceases to be an animal. As Billy Crystal noted in The Princess Bride (1987), "There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead."
The Telegram quotes Judge Michael Lucci, who is considering the motion: "Im a little surprised this issue hasnt been tackled before in another case." Yeah, we're sure this sort of thing comes up all the time up there.
(Excerpt) Read more at opinionjournal.com ...
TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events; US: Minnesota
KEYWORDS: bryanhathaway; bryanjameshathaway; deer; fredricanderson; michaellucci; moralabsolutes; notgonnapingit; perversion; princessbride; sex
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To: Zakeet
were they married ? if so its ok
101
posted on
11/17/2006 5:46:04 PM PST
by
woofie
(creativity is destructive)
To: sokit2mebb
You nailed it NRA! What a disgusting thing he did.Yes, this one pretty well takes the cake. I've heard some pretty weird things in my time but this by far is the sickest.
To: Zakeet
Ewwwwwww.....
That guy'll never date a living human female ever again.
103
posted on
11/17/2006 5:55:47 PM PST
by
najida
(If it wasn't for fast food, I'd have no food at all.)
To: Zakeet
I had sex with a Dear once, more than once....oh...deer....well then...never mind.
104
posted on
11/17/2006 5:57:54 PM PST
by
Radix
(This Tag Line would be a better joke about John Kerry if I hadn't left out 2 words and mangled it)
To: najida
well, remember Portnoys complaint. But that was refrigereated Liver so I guess it qualifies as food.
My guess is the guy is schizophrenic or something.
To: Zakeet
When I was 16 years old, my mom found a Playboy under my mattress. His mom found The Boone and Crockett Club calendar.
106
posted on
11/17/2006 6:13:59 PM PST
by
Ghengis
(Of course freedom is free. If it wasn't, it would be called expensivedom. ~Cindy Sheehan 11/11/06)
To: Larry Lucido
thats one dear I like to skin
107
posted on
11/17/2006 6:19:48 PM PST
by
Charlespg
(Peace= When we trod the ruins of Mecca and Medina under our infidel boots.)
To: Larry Lucido
Now that looks like my kind of deer. Let me just splash on some 'Whitetail Rut Scent' and Wolf will be on his way
To: Zakeet
Why was the deer dead in the first place? Did he hit it?
To: Zakeet
Ugh Ugh Ugh... How do you live this one down?...
Every time the boy walks into a room from here on...
Oh! Dear!.. will be heard..
110
posted on
11/17/2006 7:14:52 PM PST
by
hosepipe
(CAUTION: This propaganda is laced with hyperbole)
To: Zakeet
You did what with that thing before? Sorry not interested.
111
posted on
11/17/2006 7:51:06 PM PST
by
therut
To: Zakeet
Bryan James Hathaway, 20, of Superior faces a misdemeanor charge of sexual gratification with an animal. He is accused of having sex with a dead deer he saw beside Stinson Avenue on Oct. 11
For the record Superior is in Wisconsin not Minnesota. It take a cheesehead to do something like this.
112
posted on
11/17/2006 10:35:36 PM PST
by
Valin
(Rick Santorum 08)
To: Zakeet
To: paudio
Kinda sad and gross that we even have to address this with a law! Ick!
susie
114
posted on
11/19/2006 2:17:11 PM PST
by
brytlea
(amnesty--an act of clemency by an authority by which pardon is granted esp. to a group of individual)
To: Eaker
I just kill 'em and cut 'em, ain't no shaggin' involved ping.
115
posted on
11/19/2006 2:20:39 PM PST
by
humblegunner
(If you're gonna die, die with your boots on.)
To: humblegunner
The sheep give you dirty looks during deer season.
Kinda like yer cheating on them...........
116
posted on
11/19/2006 3:55:24 PM PST
by
Eaker
(You were given the choice between war & dishonor. You chose dishonor & you will have war. -Churchill)
To: TheMom; dix; TexasCowboy; Flyer; humblegunner; Allegra; Xenalyte; thackney; antivenom; ...
Actually read the responses.
Gross topic but FReepers are damn funny!
117
posted on
11/19/2006 4:00:56 PM PST
by
Eaker
(You were given the choice between war & dishonor. You chose dishonor & you will have war. -Churchill)
To: ARealMothersSonForever
That is so sick that it fits on this thread nicely!
118
posted on
11/19/2006 4:04:28 PM PST
by
Eaker
(You were given the choice between war & dishonor. You chose dishonor & you will have war. -Churchill)
To: Eaker
Why, thanks (I think?). You shoulda been hog huntin' with some of the ole boys we hunted with. A dyin quiver joke aint nuthin.
119
posted on
11/19/2006 4:49:42 PM PST
by
ARealMothersSonForever
(We shall never forget the atrocities of September 11, 2001.)
To: mirkwood
120
posted on
11/19/2006 5:04:18 PM PST
by
patton
(Sanctimony frequently reaps its own reward.)
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