Me too. Wish I could write his speech for him, but then there would be too many bleeps to understand what he said.
I wrote a speech for him:
"My fellow Americans, it's been five years since I first took office to serve you. It's time to lay down the law.
To my Republican colleagues in Congress-it's time to cut the crap. Let's stop acting like pansies and nuke these Dems out of filibustering every judicial nominee I send up. Stop acting like Democrats and cut spending, for real. And today I propose to scrap my guest worker program-I made a mistake. Let's deport the bastards and build an electric fence from just south of San Diego all the way to where the Rio Grande dumps into the Gulf of Mexico. Who wants fried tamales??
To the Democrats in Congress-shut up.
to the Media-shut up.
To Michael Moore, Cindy Sheehan, and the rest-shut the hell up.
To the Military-thanks again. You're the one thing protecting our freedom. I propose 150% pay raises for all of you and the money will come right out of the Department of Education, which will be hereby demolished. It's a state/local issue anyway. I'm also instating shoot-to-kill orders on all suspected Al Quaeda members and French Muslims.
To North Korea and Iran-scrap the nuclear programs-NOW-or Pyongyang and Tehran will turn into smoldering piles of radioactive rubble.
To France-I told you so. Don't even think about asking us for help, you pricks."