This is what happens when one foregoes one's own responsibilities and pawns them off on others - even for hire - in the name of one's own interests. Don't want people abusing your kids, stay home and take care of them yourself.
Common sense; but, apparently something lacking in America since the 60s
But how can I afford the Mercedes Benz and Antigua vacations if my wife and I don't both work? (>/sarcasm off>)
Well, having been on both sides of that question, I can say that it can be done...but it's not an easy thing to do. In our case, it's even easier, since we have so many that would have to be in daycare that we would be committing fiscal suicide if I were working.
We moved to a lower cost of living area, since my husband's job is easy to find anywhere, and we have very little debt. Until recently, we never made enough to be able to, and now we've gotten used to it.
However, there are lots of folks who just can't afford it, and they aren't exactly living large and ignoring their kids. It's a bit difficult to manage if one of you doesn't have a well-paying job. Both my parents worked like dogs to provide for us, and we had very little extras. I don't think they were selfish people at all...quite the contrary.
If they can't act as the parent they share in the guilt.