TOP TEN THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO DO TO MICHAEL MOORE

11/5/04 | COPYRIGHT 2004

[Liz]

1. Enter him in the Ugliest Man Alive Contest.

2. Give him a gift certificate for bariatric weight-loss surgery.

3. Have his mouth wired shut.

4. Strip mine the property of his Hollywood residence.

5. Have a bonfire on the WH lawn with all his mocuumentataries.

6. Enter him in a competitive eating contest sponsored by the Tabasco company.

7. Send him edible "spam" email.

8. Star a rumor that the mfg of Ding Dongs is going out of business.

9. Make a documentary of his life in Hollywood called "I Came, I Saw, I Ate. "

10. Have Congress pass legislation to outlaw him.

[unbalanced but fair]

Have everyone laugh at everything he says.

[ditto h]

Make him ambassador to Gilligan's island.

[AnnaZ]

Just one thing... take him out to lunch and say, "Dude, what happened to your sense of humor?"

[danamco]

No, No, you are totally wrong, he's our best "friend," he delivered the victory to us, don't you see???
Unfortunately, he's also laughing all the way to the bank with all the money he extracted from his dumb libs. after they gobbled up all his propaganda!!!
Thank you Mickey Moore!!!

[Liz]

Yeah, but you'll have to mortgage your house to pay the check.

[danamco]

Make him Bush's butler.



What an unfair punishment for Bush. I would lose all my appetite if he ever entered my house!!!

[IonInsights]

Get his checking account number and routing code.

[MichelleWSC]

11. Hand him over the Iraqi insurgents for hostage

[AnnaZ]

Yeah, but you'll have to mortgage your house to pay the check.

I'm occasionally guilty of overlooking the practical implications of my ideas.

 

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[Chena]

Yep, that'd work.

[Liz]

.....(Moore's) laughing all the way to the bank with all the money he extracted from dumb libs.....

Laughing all the way to the bank, eh?

Gosh, I am hoping and praying (smirk) that Moore did not do the Hollyweird Hustle and cook the books...... like engaging in Enron-style accounting fraud to show non-existent profits on his GWB mocumentary.

I mean cooking the books is done as often as dining at LeDome. The way to go in Hollywarped.

So Moore had better recheck those books.......fast.

[Liz]

It's OK.....try again.

[Liz]

He'd look rather cute in that sailor hat.

[dfwgator]

Just ignore him, that would give him the most torture.

[Liz]

Yeah, but he already knows that (snicker).

[Liz]

Cute graphics.

[Busywhiskers]

Ingnore him.

[Radix]

9. Perform a sex change operation that has him looking like Janet Reno....well that might be an improvement...or not.

When you think about it, have you ever seen the two of them in the same room together at the same time?

[No Blue States]

Thank you. I found them.

Feed him to the lions.