RE: In other words, it isn’t shacking up, it is how you view commitment.
Well, isn’t that what marriage is all about in the first place?
If you’re doing marriage right it is. But not everybody gets that. Look at Larry King, Elizabeth Taylor. I know a guy who’s married to his 2nd wife for the 3rd time (and yes there was a number 3 and 4 in there). Some people don’t get it, and those people are probably more likely to live together without marriage because they’re prone to declaring commitment they aren’t really committed to. In a world of starter marriages and trophy wives we’ve gotten really good at screwing up relationships before they even start.
Yes it is. BUT, that is not how it is viewed by many people.
When we went through pre Cana in my wife’s old parish, and in my Lutheran one, both the priest and the pastor said the same thing. Many people view marriage as a conditional contract. Their job was to make sure that the applicants to marry knew what the Church expected, and what they should expect. The priest said that he had told people “I will not marry you just yet”.
To often the marriage is about the wedding, and not about the rest of your life.
How about people get married under the eyes of God instead of the Law. Most people who believe in God would be willing to do this more if it had no law/legal concept and those willing to get married under the Law can deal with divorce as they do now. Frankly see no reason to get married under the law at this point. It cheapens the commitment.