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Ten Reasons Why a Handgun Is Better Than a Woman [Humor, I think :)]
Samizdata.net ^ | 7/19/3

Posted on 07/19/2003 7:34:52 AM PDT by NativeNewYorker

Ten Reasons Why a Handgun Is Better Than a Woman


In reverse order, they are:


10. You can trade an old .44 for two new .22s


9. You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're

on the road.


8. If you admire a friend's handgun, and tell him so, he will probably

let you try it out a few times.


7. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a backup.


6. Your handgun will stay with you even if you're out of ammo.


5. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.


4. Handguns function normally every day of the month.


3. A handgun doesn't ask "Do these new grips make me look fat?"


2. A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.


AND.....THE NUMBER ONE REASON WHY A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN....


1. You can buy a silencer for a handgun.



TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: banglist; harpiesnotamused; hemanwomanhaterclub; iamnotlaughing; secondamendment; yellowcakehysteria
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1 posted on 07/19/2003 7:34:52 AM PDT by NativeNewYorker
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To: dorben
ping
2 posted on 07/19/2003 7:38:25 AM PDT by Cheapskate (Freedom,use it or lose it)
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To: Samizdat
How come you didn't post this? ;-)
3 posted on 07/19/2003 7:39:52 AM PDT by sauropod (There's room for all God's creatures... right next to the mashed potatoes.)
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To: Cheapskate
LOL!!
My hubby will love this!
4 posted on 07/19/2003 7:40:57 AM PDT by MaryFromMichigan (God mad us Freepers, Prozac made us friends.)
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To: NativeNewYorker
Ah, but can a handgun wash your underwear?
5 posted on 07/19/2003 7:41:23 AM PDT by stanz (Those who don't believe in evolution should go jump off the flat edge of the Earth.)
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To: NativeNewYorker
Urban Legend.
6 posted on 07/19/2003 7:42:08 AM PDT by Lazamataz (PROUDLY POSTING WITHOUT READING THE ARTICLE SINCE 1999!)
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To: stanz
no, but it can sure make you stain 'em!
7 posted on 07/19/2003 7:44:03 AM PDT by JoeSixPack1 (POW/MIA - Bring 'em home, or send us back! Semper Fi)
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To: stanz
Ah, but can a handgun wash your underwear?

Ah, but properly armed, you wouldn't soil them in the first place. ;-)

8 posted on 07/19/2003 7:44:58 AM PDT by StriperSniper (Make South Korea an island)
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To: NativeNewYorker
In keeping with the Fairness Doctrine of Free Republic...

TOP 10 REASONS WHY A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A MAN:

10. You can buy a silencer for a handgun
9. A handgun can be kept under the bed freeing up valuable closet space.
8. You can trade a 44 in for a pair of 22‘s.
7. Handguns are never gas operated.
6. You can tune and rebuild a handgun to your liking.
5. A handgun reloads FAST.
4. Handguns are always there when you need them.
3. A handgun can always be changed to a bigger caliber.
2. A handgun does not mind if you go to sleep after you're done using it.

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A MAN:


1. A handgun can have its barrel length easily and permanently altered.
9 posted on 07/19/2003 7:51:24 AM PDT by Shooter 2.5 (Don't punch holes in the lifeboat)
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To: Shooter 2.5
So tell me. Does the handgun match the holster?
10 posted on 07/19/2003 7:54:01 AM PDT by sauropod ("Come over here and make me. I dare you. You little fruitcake, you little fruitcake.")
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To: sauropod
I always liked a holster that fit the handgun. I never cared for the "one size fits all" category.
11 posted on 07/19/2003 7:57:29 AM PDT by Shooter 2.5 (Don't punch holes in the lifeboat)
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To: Shooter 2.5
As long as its embroidered...
12 posted on 07/19/2003 8:01:01 AM PDT by sauropod ("Come over here and make me. I dare you. You little fruitcake, you little fruitcake.")
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To: *bang_list
Bang
13 posted on 07/19/2003 8:04:17 AM PDT by Atlas Sneezed
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To: Shooter 2.5
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON A HANDGUN IS JUST LIKE A MAN:

They just can't seem to be able to develop that SMART GUN!

14 posted on 07/19/2003 8:06:12 AM PDT by smokeyb
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To: Shooter 2.5
a handgun is better then a man because :

with a handgun you can be sure you have at least a six shooter
15 posted on 07/19/2003 8:07:13 AM PDT by tlb
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To: tlb
I thought this one was funny:

When the box says 6 inches, it really is 6 inches.
16 posted on 07/19/2003 8:11:26 AM PDT by Shooter 2.5 (Don't punch holes in the lifeboat)
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To: NativeNewYorker
Love your title.
17 posted on 07/19/2003 8:11:59 AM PDT by Howlin
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To: Shooter 2.5
I prefer this list, thanks for the laughs!
18 posted on 07/19/2003 8:18:57 AM PDT by LibertyThug
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To: Brad's Gramma
Good morning my FRiend!
Thought you might enjoy a little chuckle this a.m.!
19 posted on 07/19/2003 8:31:48 AM PDT by MaryFromMichigan (God mad us Freepers, Prozac made us friends.)
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To: NativeNewYorker
Funny list! I'm going to send it to a friend who does a local conservative talk radio show this afternoon...we'll see if it gets on air!
20 posted on 07/19/2003 8:40:32 AM PDT by Rennes Templar
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