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(Dennis) Miller's Crossing . . .
The Weekly Standard ^ | 07/28/03 | Eric Pfeiffer

Posted on 07/18/2003 9:25:26 PM PDT by Pokey78

to the right side of the political street.

DENNIS MILLER insists he's not an across-the-board conservative, which may technically be true. Still, there's no doubt America's most sophisticated and most political comedian has been coming out of the conservative closet in a very big way. He hung out with President Bush and campaigned for him earlier this month on a weekend fundraising trip through California. And, on late night talk shows, Miller has applauded President Bush's leadership and cheered the overthrow of Saddam Hussein. Moreover, Miller has lately been pounding the Democratic leadership, the abortion lobby, the French, and big-time lefties like Norman Mailer and Michael Moore. And recently Miller took the final, defining step to becoming a big-time public conservative, by signing up for a regular gig at Fox.

In his first return to weekly television since ending his Emmy award-winning HBO series "Dennis Miller Live" last year, Miller has agreed to provide commentary Friday nights on the "Hannity & Colmes" show. In a recent phone interview from Los Angeles, Miller told me why he got back into television. "There are things that irk me," he said. "I wanted to have a place where I could express my opinions."

The day after his inaugural Fox commentary, Miller traveled with President Bush aboard Air Force One on their way to a reelection fundraiser. "He's a fine man and I'm proud he's my president. I enjoyed spending the day with him." And Miller left little doubt that he'd make time for the president over the next 16 months: "I'd love to. I want this man to be president again. It's a dangerous world, and I can't have guys who are soft on that fact. There are no 'al Kindas.'"

Although Miller served up the red meat to Bush supporters at the fundraiser, he was reportedly booed for joking about West Virginia senator Robert Byrd's former association with the Ku Klux Klan. "I think he's burning the cross at both ends," Miller had riffed. The story gave rise to some public finger-wagging, so I asked him about it. "That pointed out how interesting the coverage is to me. At some point, someone went 'ooh' at the intensity of my remarks. You can call that a 'boo' if you want. Believe me, I was preaching to the choir there. I doubt they were Robert Byrd fans. You know, if there is one place in the world where there are more portraits and buildings named after 'The Leader' than in Iraq, it's West Virginia."

But back to the whole political identity business: "I don't think of myself as a classic conservative," says Miller. "I think of myself as a pragmatist. And these days, pragmatism falls into the conservative camp. We have to depend on ourselves in this country right now because we can't depend on anyone else. We are simultaneously the most loved, hated, feared, and respected nation on this planet. In short, we're Frank Sinatra. And Sinatra didn't become Sinatra playing down for punks outside the Fontainebleau [Hotel]."

September 11 marked the turning point of Miller's voyage to the right, but as far back as 1996 he was referring to himself as a conservative libertarian. Increasingly, Miller couldn't stomach the left's many attempts to demonize politicians like Rudy Giuliani and, later, Attorney General John Ashcroft. "With Giuliani, I was preconditioned to think he was heavy-handed. When actually examining him for myself, I said, 'Wow, New York seems to be running so well.' The guy has a good sense of humor when he talks. I dug him. And then obviously everything was borne out after 9/11 what a great man he is. And with John Ashcroft, the main civil liberty I'm looking to protect is the 'me not getting blown up' one. I don't know if it's written down anywhere in Tom Paine's crib sheets, but that's my big one."

Miller's not shy about military action. Against Syria, he supports it. Also in Iran, where he says regime change will be an "easier overthrow" than in Iraq. Intervention in Liberia he views as a way of bringing stragglers in the international community back on board. "I think we have to send a few mall cops over, quite frankly. Who's the man in charge over there, Chuck Taylor? Didn't he invent Converse All Stars? It can't be that hard. Let's send some guys over from Nike and Puma."

While he waits for freedom to spread through the Middle East, Miller's ready to see democracy in action in his home state of California. "We've got a $38 billion deficit. I look at the California budget, and I see that we're paying to remove tattoos. It's the petri dish for untethered liberalism. I'm telling you, this place is turning into Sweden. Except, at least there the blondes are authentic." Not only does Miller support the effort to recall the governor, Gray Davis, he's already picked out a candidate: Arnold Schwarzenegger. "I would vote for him, and I would work for Arnold in a second. You know, it's no longer the San Andreas Fault. It's become Gray Davis's fault."

He's got ammunition for other Democrats as well. Sizing up the party's presidential candidates, he says, "I knew Kerry was going to have to run for president because his features are so chiseled, his actual skull could be on Mt. Rushmore. The guy looks like an Easter Island statue in a power tie. Howard Dean can roll up his sleeves in public all he wants, but as long as you can see that heart tattoo with Neville Chamberlain's name on his right forearm, he's never going to get off the pad. I hope they send Howard Dean out to do battle with Bush because he'll get his ass handed to him quicker than someone who just got out of liposuction surgery."

And it's not just leading Democrats who rile Miller, but the party as well, beginning with DNC chairman Terry McAuliffe: "You know, people are looking to buy a way of life here, and McAuliffe looks like he's trying to sell them a used Z28. I think you're talking about 7 out of 10 people are thinking what I'm thinking. They want to be protected. It's fine to talk about health care, but I think most people are thinking they don't want to have to use their health care to get stitched up after they're blown up in a bomb blast by a nut case. They want the nut case killed before that happens. So, in that case, it becomes preemptive health care. As I get older, it seems unsafe to me to be anything but a conservative."

Eric Pfeiffer is a writer in Washington, D.C.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Extended News; Government; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: dennismiller
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1 posted on 07/18/2003 9:25:26 PM PDT by Pokey78
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To: Pokey78
Tasty stuff Dennis. Tasty stuff!
2 posted on 07/18/2003 9:40:57 PM PDT by isthisnickcool (Liberals - Their neural synapses are corroded.)
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To: All
Thank you very much!
Thank you very much!
That's the nicest thing that anyone's ever done for me.
It isn't every day
good fortune comes me way!
I never thought the future would be fun for me!
And if I had a bugle
I would blow it to add a sort
o' how's your father's touch.
But since I left me bugle at home
I simply have to say
Thank you very, very, very much!
Thank you very, very, very much!

Thank you for your donation!


3 posted on 07/18/2003 9:41:24 PM PDT by Support Free Republic (Your support keeps Free Republic going strong!)
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To: Pokey78
Dennis Miller Bump. ROFLMAO
4 posted on 07/18/2003 9:46:01 PM PDT by CPT Clay
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To: Pokey78
I want to like him...but, is he a gun grabber?
5 posted on 07/18/2003 9:55:30 PM PDT by alphadog (die commie scum)
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To: alphadog
I want to like him...but, is he a gun grabber?

Sadly, yes he is.

6 posted on 07/18/2003 10:05:10 PM PDT by jlogajan
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To: jlogajan; alphadog
Check back in a couple years. Miller may have rubbed elbows with enough conservatives by then to realize he wants them to have guns.
7 posted on 07/18/2003 10:38:37 PM PDT by patriciaruth
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To: patriciaruth
Miller goes to Washington and Limbaugh goes to NFL.

What a country!

8 posted on 07/18/2003 10:51:22 PM PDT by chuckles
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To: patriciaruth
Miller might not have guns (yet) but he's sure got guts.

And he's smart. He's been an acquired taste for me...
his one, two punches (punch lines?) send cruise missiles right through the moldy heart of liberalism.
9 posted on 07/18/2003 10:51:47 PM PDT by b9
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To: Pokey78
He hasn't "crossed" until he's burned the bridges. Public and vehement castigations of the Hollywierd Left and Al Franken in particular. OR sincere and numerous public apologies to Dan Quayle for years of embarrasingly cheap, lame, and gratuitous one-liners during his time on SNL. (Weekend Update was unfailingly predictable during his tenure at the desk.) Without that, he'll just be another comic to me.
10 posted on 07/18/2003 11:08:09 PM PDT by BradyLS
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To: BradyLS
"But back to the whole political identity business: "I don't think of myself as a classic conservative," says Miller. "I think of myself as a pragmatist. And these days, pragmatism falls into the conservative camp."

Yes, "these days." On other days, when pragmatism dictates that he recross the border into the liberal camp, well see him for the opportunist he admits to being. Miller can be funny, but he clearly has no set of moral values to truly guide him.

11 posted on 07/18/2003 11:12:32 PM PDT by BradyLS
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To: patriciaruth
Thanks...I guess some of those SNL skits he did were for real...Quote "From my cold dead hands" Miller said "whatever"
12 posted on 07/18/2003 11:49:19 PM PDT by alphadog (die commie scum)
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To: Pokey78
The guy looks like an Easter Island statue in a power tie.

That one actually had me LOL for real.

13 posted on 07/18/2003 11:54:12 PM PDT by Hugin
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To: Pokey78
Miller makes a number of esoteric references. He may figure that since most liberals have no better than a third-grade education, he is best off finding Republican audiences. Unlike liberals, most Republicans have attended college, read classic and modern literature...and today are more mainstream than liberals. Perhaps that wasn't always the case, I don't know.
14 posted on 07/19/2003 12:17:20 AM PDT by jagrmeister
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To: Pokey78
You know, if there is one place in the world where there are more portraits and buildings named after 'The Leader' than in Iraq, it's West Virginia."

That is so absolutely true. Byrd's career has been one long 'home state legacy building' campaign.

15 posted on 07/19/2003 3:01:39 AM PDT by tdadams
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To: BradyLS
You wonder - has reality bit him enough that he has new beliefs, or has he decided "good career move"?
16 posted on 07/19/2003 3:07:28 AM PDT by 185JHP ( Penumbras. Emanations. Fatuities.)
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To: 185JHP
He also took on a conservative facade for a while back when Ronald Reagan was President.
17 posted on 07/19/2003 3:10:44 AM PDT by Roscoe
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To: Pokey78
Great find Pokey! Dennis Miller for Gov. of CA!!!
18 posted on 07/19/2003 3:13:21 AM PDT by JustPiper (Am I going or are you coming? Socialist Democratic = Commie!)
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To: Roscoe
Thanks. I didn't remember that.
19 posted on 07/19/2003 3:17:46 AM PDT by 185JHP ( Penumbras. Emanations. Fatuities.)
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To: 185JHP
Miller is the sort of seasonal bird that migrates between the Left and Right Poles.
20 posted on 07/19/2003 2:41:01 PM PDT by BradyLS
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