Laura Mardovich, who lost former husband Ed on Sept. 11, gets married to family friend Robert Balemian at St. Patrick's Church in Huntington, L.I. - N.Y. Post: Mary McLoughlin Posted on 04/14/2002 1:03:20 AM PDT by alisasny
9/11 WIDOW REMARRIES
| Laura Mardovich, who lost former husband Ed on Sept. 11, gets married to family friend Robert Balemian at St. Patrick's Church in Huntington, L.I. - N.Y. Post: Mary McLoughlin |
Wearing white and beaming broadly, Laura Mardovich married family friend Robert Balemian Friday.
People exchange their wedding vows every day, but what is unusual about this marriage is that Laura is a Sept. 11 widow - perhaps the first to remarry.
The priest who pronounced Laura and Robert man and wife saw their union as an uplifting sign for a parish that lost 18 people in the terrorist attacks - a sign that Laura is moving on with her life.
But to some friends and relatives, seven months is a short time to grieve - and they are stunned by the marriage.
Their feelings are all the more intense because Laura, 41, and her first husband, Ed Mardovich, 42, had what by all accounts was a storybook union.
He was the president of the securities division of Euro Brokers, a thriving investment firm, and the couple and their four children lived in tony Lloyd Harbor on Long Island's North Shore.
"They were a dream couple with beautiful children," said Robert Nogrady, a longtime friend.
The night before the attacks, Laura and Ed celebrated their 16th anniversary at Alain Ducasse, the exclusive Manhattan restaurant.
Afterward, Laura recalled that for the first time she could remember, Ed seemed satisfied with his life.
"Nothing compares to that night we had," she said. "He just had that look, like, ‘Maybe I am kind of special.' We said we would remember that night when we're 80 years old."
But it was not to be.
The next morning Ed went to his office on the 84th floor of the south tower of the World Trade Center. When the first hijacked plane ripped into the WTC's north tower, Ed called Laura on his cell phone to say he was safe.
He never came home - one of 60 Euro Brokers employees to die on Sept. 11.
After Ed's death, Laura changed.
"You could tell she was moving on," Nogrady said.
She closed out the family's brokerage account without saying goodbye to Nogrady, who handled it.
"I was a little hurt," he said.
She didn't return calls from relatives, who interpreted this as meaning she didn't want reminders of the past.
And she began seeing Balemian, a family friend and a widower with a child.
The couple got married at St. Patrick's Church in Huntington and toasted their union at a reception at the Waldorf-Astoria. They left on their honeymoon yesterday.
The Rev. Steve Berbig, who performed the marriage ceremony, said it is common for widows and widowers to remarry quickly because they are used to being married.
"Widows remarrying is routine - but this was a little more special. It was uplifting and positive for everyone around.
"There was an understood silence of what happened before," but the wedding's focus was "the present and now," Berbig said.
"As a priest, I was so happy for this couple. It was a great personal experience for me. People were very happy for them."
One relative, however, was anything but happy. "I don't understand," she said. "I can see her wanting to go on with her life. I always wanted her to remarry, but I never thought she would do it this way."
Despite our past differences, you're a good man. I have newfound respect for you after reading your story. Thanks for sharing it.
I agree. I hope this couple shares many happy days together. They both know the heartache of losing their spouses. Wonder if someone up above had something to do with this union ;-)
No when a spouse dies all too often that is the end of the relationship with the spouses family as well as friends. I haven't seen any joint friends of me and my first wifes in 17 years. I've seen my former in laws less than a dozen times. What we shared in common was gone. As for family? Sometimes those who scream the loudest in protest of these situations being wrong are the ones who feel the most guilt for how they themselves treated the deceased family member.
These two persons it seemed shared some common memories and sought solitude there. There is nothing wrong with it. I would bet both felt out of place with friends and family upon their losses.
Read about David and the loss of his son with Bethshebia he talks all about mourning. Read Jewish customs it was common for a brother of a spouse to take his brothers widow. We as Christians all too often abandon the concept of taking care of widows thinking it is something to have to suffer through till society is satisfied on time restraints. Conclusion? GOD did not intend for us to live alone.
This woman is a multi-millionaire. They held the reception at the Waldorf-Astoria, for heaven's sake. She doesn't need to be 'taken care of.' That's what so creepy about this.
Being "taken care of" does not always have $$$ involved. A person can be "taken care of" with love, companionship and respect.
Well, well, well.....aren't you just special......bless your little ol' heart!
Who cares.......who gives a damn whether she wears white, black, purple, polka dots or stripes.....did you have to pay for it?
And about that obligatory year....who died and left you in charge of defining what an 'obligatory' year is.....why not 3 or 9? What law was broken? Sheesh.......as I said, bless your lil' ol' heart!
And aren't you being a little tart at the implication that the lady involved comes from a 'bad family'.........you sound like the Sister Sal's who, once someone accepts Christ in their life, immediately begins telling them what a Christian does and doesn't do!!! Get a life, lady.
My step-dad fell in love again within 6-7 months of losing my mother to cancer. NEVER did I question his love for my mother, who was gone. I was happy to see him find someone so he would not be alone. Good thing he did too... He died only a few months later of a sudden aneurism...
He died within the year following the death of my mother. In that last year, he found joy again and, I hope the lady he had fallen for will as well. They didn't have time to marry. We never really know how much time there is left do we? Mourn as long as you feel like mourning, and in the way that brings you the most peace... but don't assume when folk go on with their lives they ever stop remembering and loving the one who is gone.
And this other thought has been rolling around in my head.... not to make assumptions about any of the marriages that are the topic of this post, but buried beneath the rubble of the WTC are many spouses. That disaster ended many marriages, some good, and no doubt, some bad. The survivors of those who were lost know, and how the trajedy affects the rest of their lives is their row to hoe. And none of our business.
Hum, and weddings should be a time of mourning? They seek something far more valueable than their wealth the true treasures of happiness. Money doesn't cure being alone. It doesn't comfort an empty heart. There is a lot more to the charge to take care of widows and orphans than monetary considerations. They family is best preserved in the traditional mother father husband wife bond. No money can be a substitute for that. Money can't buy it.
As for the Waldorf-Astoria in a Biblical sense wedding were festivals and parties. There was nothing wrong that either. The needs of the soul and spirit are far more important than the needs of creature comforts {money}.
For all we know, he & his wife could have been godparents to one of the lady's kids....the article doesn't give a whole lot of info.
Surely to God, the priest would have had discussions of these topics--there were 18 other families in his parish that suffered.
Also, based on the lady's comment about her husband's actions the night of their celebration of their 16th year of marriage, I doubt he would ahve been so content in his life if his wife was an airhead who would have just climbed in the sack with whomever because she couldn't stand to be alone.
Further, I don't put a lot of stock in the 'relatives' being miffed or feeling cut off....how many of us have relatives we would cut out of our lives over how they've treated us, or kids, our spouses, or whatever......
When my mother remarried 22 years ago, which in turn was 12 years after divorcing my father, she wore a nice spring dress but not a wedding gown.
On the other hand, when we had a wedding during our Sunday morning service at my church, the bride wore white although she was being rehitched.
foreverfree
There are four grieving children involved. They are hurting, and a new stepfather and their mother's preoccupation with him is NOT helping them cope, believe me.
Val, you will have to forgive me, I can't just take your word for it, that this man is "hurting" the children. None of us are in that household and cannot attempt to speak for what is going on there. Yes, they are hurting for the death of their father, but for all we know, he can be a very wonderful man and a Godsend. I believe the article said he was a widow and had a child also, therefore he has dealt with this before. If this were a divorce, and she remarried 7 months later, perhaps I would agree with you. However, their Daddy is NEVER coming home. Perhaps, she wanted a fatherly figure (not to "replace" but to help raise), her children and found it in this man. Again, I wish them nothing but happiness, they've been through enough. Leave the judgemental attitude with such little basis and information given to the libs. We FReepers are supposed to be above such tactics.
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