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Airport Screener Haiku Poetry
LurkedLongEnough
| April 11, 2002
| LurkedLongEnough
Posted on 04/11/2002 8:11:30 AM PDT by LurkedLongEnough
Airport Screener Haiku
Not enough money
Scanning is such a royal pain
Except for the fun
You keep no secrets
From me, the airport screener
Xrays expose you
Hurried passengers
Sometimes get very angry
When I say "shoes off"
An elderly man
Whose cane looks like solid wood
Scare him with the wand
Twisted grimace man
Take that laptop computer
Shut up - turn it on
I smirk inside when
I notice zippered pockets
Dump out everything
Someone missing flight
Take your time with him, and do
All the tests on him.
Three kids and a dog
Grill Mom with stern-faced questions
Tell her: spread legs wide
Staring at the screen
Suddenly a safety pin
Transforms to weapon
Call National Guard!
I can be on nightly news!
Symbol of boredom.
Time for coffee break
Unplug an xray machine
Evacuate terminal
TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
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Today is my 1-year anniversary as an enrolled member of Free Republic. I hope these measly little poems give someone a laugh, and maybe provoke funnier haiku from the FR experts.
To: LurkedLongEnough
Trouble at airport!
My husband is on that plane!!!
Must take shower first
To: LurkedLongEnough
Blonde chick with big boobs
Belly shirt and low slung jeans
Must do special search
3
posted on
04/11/2002 8:21:54 AM PDT
by
blau993
To: freedomson
Hated bourgeois scum!
Time for working-class payback:
My hands down your pants
4
posted on
04/11/2002 8:23:17 AM PDT
by
B-Chan
To: freedomson
They've gone way too far
Only one way to stop this
Never fly again
5
posted on
04/11/2002 8:26:41 AM PDT
by
freeeee
To: LurkedLongEnough
I enjoyed them ... you should publish them. Spot on IMO.
6
posted on
04/11/2002 8:27:07 AM PDT
by
mgc1122
To: f.Christian
Rise and shine....Aloha ping!
sw
7
posted on
04/11/2002 8:30:06 AM PDT
by
spectre
To: LurkedLongEnough
Beeeep! Take off your belt.
Beeeep! Take off your shoes and socks.
Beeeep! Step this way, please.
To: LurkedLongEnough
This could take hours-
Doing search on Don King's hair.
Lindberg baby found!
To: LurkedLongEnough
Government expands
Civil rights are obstructed
Terrorists chuckle
To: LurkedLongEnough
These were great! Happy anniversary. =)
To: LurkedLongEnough
No gun for pilot
Safest way to stop hijack
Feds shoot the plane down
12
posted on
04/11/2002 8:34:13 AM PDT
by
freeeee
To: LurkedLongEnough
hee hee -- these are GOOD
Cute Arab man smiles
He likes me, I'm aflutter
What was in his bag?
To: LurkedLongEnough
Beeep - Off with your sneakers
Note to self
Must Remember
To: areafiftyone
Beeep - Off with your sneakers
Note to self
Must Remember
No more batteries in sneakers
To: LurkedLongEnough
Must call manager
Nosehair clipper is quite sharp
Ah! blunt tips o.k.
16
posted on
04/11/2002 8:40:22 AM PDT
by
Tauzero
To: freedomson
Trouble at airport!
My husband is on that plane!!!
Must take shower first
ROTFLMAO!!! Ha ha!
To: chriservative
Suspicious Person
Time for a cavity search
Oops, out of KY
To: LurkedLongEnough
Used to flip burgers
Too stupid to be a cop
Ahhh, the perfect job
19
posted on
04/11/2002 8:46:17 AM PDT
by
freeeee
To: freedomson
I still rate that as the funniest single thread I have ever seen on FR. A FR legend!
20
posted on
04/11/2002 8:46:33 AM PDT
by
blau993
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