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This blonde really wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary tools together, she made for the nearest frozen lake. After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a circular cut in the ice. Suddenly---from the sky---a voice boomed,

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"

Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a Thermos of cappuccino, and began to cut yet another hole. Again, from the heavens, the voice bellowed,

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"

The Blonde, now quite worried, moved way down to the opposite end of the ice, set up her stool, and tried again to cut her hole. The voice came once more, even louder:

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE!"

She stopped, looked skyward, and said, " Is that you, Lord?"

The voice replied, "NO, THIS IS THE ICE RINK MANAGER"

Two blondes were walking down a path through a forest. Suddenly, one looked down, and saw tracks. "Look! Deer tracks! I found deer tracks!"

"No," said the other blonde, "those are bear tracks!"

The first blonde protested, "Deer tracks!", and the other one insisted, "No, bear tracks!"

They were still arguing about it when the train hit them.