[Sabertooth]

There once was a finicky ocelot,
Who all year long was cross a lot,
            Except at Thanksgiving,
            When he enjoyed living
And ate cranberry sauce a lot.

~Ogden Nash

[Victoria Delsoul]

Men

It's amazing the things guys
try to make us believe.
Really girls, do we look that naive?

How many hours they spend in the weeks,
thinking of ways to get us between sheets.
Their pickup lines are really lame,
most of them seem to be all the same.
And professional men they all seem to be,
making big bucks is what they tell me.

Heaven forbid,
if you're classed as a blond.
Then they think, they can't go wrong.
They don't seem to know
this color comes in a bottle.

But most know the difference between
a wiggle and a wottle.
We won't tell them all that we know,
we'll just let them put on their show!