But how can that be, since we've been assured by Russia that it wasn't sunk, that it didn't sink, that it wasn't hit by a missile, that it only had a minor fire on board, and the crew was evacuated for its safety, then the ship was towed back to port, but oh, wait, it sank while being towed. And no one died. They just can't come to the phone right now when their family members call.
Oh. But it had nonuclear warheads on board. (Ignore those divers frantically working underwater to retrieve salt-water-soaked cruise missiles with wet black powder-charged cannonballs.)