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Is Everything We’ve Been Told About Marriage and Divorce Completely Wrong?
The Blaze ^ | 05/06/2014 | Billy Hallowell

Posted on 02/08/2015 10:32:09 AM PST by tbw2

The divorce rate isn't 50% - and the divorce rate has been falling for two decades.


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: divorce; family; marriage
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The media repeats the lie that the divorce rate is 50%, causing many to refuse to get married in the first place. Where did this misconception come from, and what is the real state of marriage?
1 posted on 02/08/2015 10:32:09 AM PST by tbw2
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To: tbw2

http://www.afajournal.org/recent-issues/2015/january/the-real-threat-to-marriage/

She has finally discovered the divorce rate in America is nowhere close to 50%. And it never has been. As a matter of fact, the rate has been steadily declining since 1980. In reality, 71% of women are still married to their first spouse. And widowhood reduces the remaining 29%, bringing us to an approximate 25% divorce rate for first marriages.

Additionally, Feldhahn told AFA Journal, the rate of divorce is not the same among Christians. Previously reported numbers were based solely on belief systems (stated religion) and not whether those beliefs were actually being practiced in their lives. With the help of Barna Group’s comprehensive research from 2008, Feldhahn and her staff were able to incorporate participants’ answers about church attendance. The results revealed a 27% decrease in the number of divorces among those who had been to church in the last seven days.

Landmark findings by the National Survey of Families and Households between 1987 and 1994 revealed a 50% lesser occasion of divorce among those who share the same faith and attend church. A Family Life Family Needs Survey among more than 50 churches in 2012-2013 found that only 22% of those ever married had been divorced. Numbers vary, but no matter which way you cut it, divorce in the church is lower. And divorce overall is much lower than the numbers pushed by secular media and others.


2 posted on 02/08/2015 10:35:03 AM PST by Jack Hydrazine (Pubbies = national collectivists; Dems = international collectivists; We need a second party!)
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To: tbw2
I think the "not getting married in the first place" is the main reason for the decline. Since it has become socially acceptable to shack up, we now have a good number of people out there bouncing from live-in relationship to live-in relationship, without the attendant divorces and the nasty alimony and child custody battles that go with them.

Many people getting married typically have already co-habitated with each other for a period of time and have determined that they are a good fit for each other long-term.

3 posted on 02/08/2015 10:36:19 AM PST by SamAdams76
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To: tbw2

I’m not surprised the divorce rate among religious people are low.

If you’re a happy person so is your spouse and happier people tend to stay together for the long haul.

To stay married ain’t rocket science.


4 posted on 02/08/2015 10:37:21 AM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives In My Heart Forever)
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To: tbw2
Among non-contracepting couples, the divorce rate is under 5%.

A Simple Secret for Better Sex, Marriages, Health and Society

5 posted on 02/08/2015 10:39:20 AM PST by St_Thomas_Aquinas ( Isaiah 22:22, Matthew 16:19, Revelation 3:7)
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To: SamAdams76
I know I'd rather live alone than get married again. That's why I wound up with a tiny little one-bedroom, one-closet shack. No room for a woman's stuff here. ;)

Potential #4 agrees. I'm better off single and celibate. And she is "She who must be obeyed" even without a ring.

/johnny

6 posted on 02/08/2015 10:40:49 AM PST by JRandomFreeper (gone Galt)
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To: JRandomFreeper
I know I'd rather live alone than get married again.

I was never more alone than when I was married.
7 posted on 02/08/2015 10:45:35 AM PST by Nepeta
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To: SamAdams76

“””Many people getting married typically have already co-habitated with each other for a period of time and have determined that they are a good fit for each other long-term. “””

Seems logical, however the evidence suggests that couples who cohabit before marriage actually increase their chance of divorce later. Here’s an article from HuffPo (not a site I would place in the strongly pro-marriage camp).

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robert-hughes/does-cohabitation-increas_b_808348.html

Surprise. Living together doesn’t seem to help.


8 posted on 02/08/2015 10:47:48 AM PST by newheart (The greatest trick the Left ever pulled was convincing the world it was not a religion.)
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To: St_Thomas_Aquinas

I’ve learned a great deal in my three years as an RCIA team member about NFP. My favorite piece was a man who said that his wife was created perfect and that he didn’t need to control her fertility but that they together needed to balance their relationship. Very powerful stuff.


9 posted on 02/08/2015 10:50:09 AM PST by Mercat
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To: AdmSmith; AnonymousConservative; Berosus; bigheadfred; Bockscar; cardinal4; ColdOne; ...
In reality, 71% of women are still married to their first spouse. And widowhood reduces the remaining 29%, bringing us to an approximate 25% divorce rate for first marriages.

10 posted on 02/08/2015 10:50:23 AM PST by SunkenCiv (Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary men)
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To: SamAdams76

Married 27 years here.


11 posted on 02/08/2015 11:00:09 AM PST by poobear (Socialism in the minds of the elites is a con-game for the serfs, nothing more.)
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To: tbw2

You can’t have a divorce if you don’t get married. Sum up divorce rate + families with children born out of wedlock and you will get far higher than 50% screwed up families. No amount of statistics manipulation is going to change that.


12 posted on 02/08/2015 11:03:31 AM PST by sagar
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To: SamAdams76

The odds of two people who marry and have children breaking up before the kid is 15 is 25%.
If they are never married, the odds of a split before the kid is 15 rise to 75%.
Unmarried unions are less stable, even if they plan to be together.


13 posted on 02/08/2015 11:09:41 AM PST by tbw2
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To: Mercat

At bottom, it’s giving up control and trusting in God. That trust spills over into all areas of life. I found it to be very liberating. It saddens me whenever people say things like, “we’re going to stop at two.”


14 posted on 02/08/2015 11:09:45 AM PST by St_Thomas_Aquinas ( Isaiah 22:22, Matthew 16:19, Revelation 3:7)
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To: tbw2
I agree with that. That's why I portrayed unmarried couples shacking up as bouncing from partner to partner.

I was just theorizing that the divorce rate is dropping because a) more people are shacking up as opposed to marrying and b) those that do marry, tend to be more sure about the relationship lasting long term.

15 posted on 02/08/2015 11:15:03 AM PST by SamAdams76
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To: Nepeta

I’m so sorry to hear that story. We’ve been married almost 44 years and we are really best friends.


16 posted on 02/08/2015 11:18:34 AM PST by freeangel ( (free speech is only good until someone else doesn't like it)
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To: SamAdams76

Divorce rates are far higher for people who have lived together first.

If you live with someone for seven years, you are in many states considered to be common law “married”.

Child custody battles aren’t made less difficult by not marrying. They are made more difficult.

Imagine you have a child with a woman. Five years later she files for divorce. As a man, you have no rights whatsoever. The child you love is gone!

Is that easier?


17 posted on 02/08/2015 11:26:40 AM PST by DoughtyOne (The question is Jeb Bush. The answer is NO!)
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To: tbw2

It is usually expressed as “half of all marriages end in divorce” That is probably true. The divorce rate for first marriages is not %50 though. Serial divorcers skew the stats. I’m sure the rates dropped after the deaths of Elizabeth Taylor and Mickey Rooney


18 posted on 02/08/2015 12:06:14 PM PST by Figment
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To: freeangel

Congrats.. 41 years here and married my high school sweetheart 4 months out of school when we were 18. And no, we had our first daughter when we were 23 and 2nd daughter at 30.


19 posted on 02/08/2015 12:23:53 PM PST by maddog55
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To: tbw2

Had a friend of mine that recently got married at our house over Memorial Weekend. Been having Vet friends in on Memorial Weekend for 20 years now. Anyway, 8 of us plus the groom went to a small bar on Saturday, the day of the wedding to make a toast and have a round. Just for the hell of it I did a survey of of all of us and asked each one how many times they had been married..... total number of wives was 23. I’ve only been married once and still am married (41 years).


20 posted on 02/08/2015 12:32:59 PM PST by maddog55
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