The first thing is you don’t play defense because you’re first action is to concede playing on your opponents field that they designed. 99% of responses to accusations like this I see on FR can be summed up as variations in two categories;
1. I’m not racist, why a couple of my friends are black!
2. I know I am but what are you?
Once yo do that you accept their premise and end up doingnothing but defending youself against an accusation that you believe to be false.
You’ve already lost and the saddest par is you don’t even know it.
The strategy should be to attack the premise before it has a chance to get legs. Always play offense, put your opponent on defense.
I’ll formulate a response I would have made and post it in a while.
I knew that side of it; what I’m wanting is what you are working on — the proactive comment to defuse the charge.