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YOU MIGHT BE A TALIBAN IF...'
Velvet Hammer ^ | 3-6-08 | self

Posted on 03/06/2008 10:05:44 PM PST by Nachum

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon “unclean.”

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can’t think of anyone you HAVEN’T declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You’ve often uttered the phrase, ” I love what you’ve done with your cave.”

10. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

11. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

12. You’ve ever had a crush on your neighbor’s goat.


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: be; might; taliban; you
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1 posted on 03/06/2008 10:05:45 PM PST by Nachum
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To: Nachum
11. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

Uh ohh. I'm in trouble now.

2 posted on 03/06/2008 10:07:32 PM PST by MaxMax (I need a life after politics)
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To: Nachum

13, You worship a rock and are determined to make the whole world worship your rock.


3 posted on 03/06/2008 10:13:58 PM PST by ARE SOLE (Agents Ramos and Campean are in prison at this very moment.. (A "Concerned Citizen".)
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To: Nachum
You'll kill anyone that says you’re not peaceful.
4 posted on 03/06/2008 10:15:12 PM PST by Taxbilly
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To: Nachum
C'mon Mr. Tal-i-ban,
5 posted on 03/06/2008 10:26:14 PM PST by BlueDragon (aah, the luxury of being just another poor, anonymous slob!)
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To: ARE SOLE
13, You worship a rock and are determined to make the whole world worship your rock.

There is something very frightening about a world in which millions of people will play stinkbug, with their buts in the air, several times a day, pointing towards a small meteorite that fell thousands of years ago -

It illustrates that millions of people can be duped into believing anything - and when that belief is without reason, you have millions of robots who will do whatever they are told.

6 posted on 03/06/2008 10:30:07 PM PST by maine-iac7 (",,,but you can't fool all of the people all the time" LINCOLN)
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To: Nachum

[xx]. You envy all male infidels because of their large penises. Especially Americans. Janet Reno included.


7 posted on 03/06/2008 10:36:23 PM PST by 50cal Smokepole (Illegetimi non carborundum.)
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To: ARE SOLE
A really shiny rock.

Apparently, this POS thing floats. Some pumice chipped from the remains of a Roman bathhouse perhaps?

^ Khaled Mashal, Hamass leader, after Madwoman Halfbright and Burr Hussein Crinton nixed the Israeli execution attempt. He likes the pretty rock.

8 posted on 03/06/2008 10:49:56 PM PST by M203M4 (True Universal Suffrage: Pets of dead illegal-immigrant felons voting Democrat (twice))
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To: Nachum; ARE SOLE

Thanks these are great! :)


9 posted on 03/06/2008 10:50:33 PM PST by Steve Van Doorn (*in my best Eric cartman voice* 'I love you guys')
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To: Nachum

Give the Taliban a break...

If all bars served no alcohol and all the women were covered from head to toe in a Burqa, you’d want to strap a bomb on yourself too.


10 posted on 03/06/2008 10:56:50 PM PST by Eric Blair 2084 (Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms shouldn't be a federal agency...it should be a convenience store.)
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To: Nachum
Hey, Mister Taliban, tally me banana...

Daylight come and me wan' go home.

11 posted on 03/06/2008 11:57:03 PM PST by 60Gunner (Please tell me the roads are clear so I can go home...)
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To: Nachum

14. You’d rather have your daughter raped than have an education.

15. You’d rather rape your daughter than let your brothers do it first.


12 posted on 03/07/2008 1:03:53 AM PST by kajingawd (Humans share 50.6% of their DNA with bananas...most my friends are bananas)
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To: Nachum
YOU MIGHT BE A TALIBAN IF...’

You think an assault with fifty men and machine guns against a US Stryker Brigade may be successful.

13 posted on 03/07/2008 1:17:21 AM PST by endthematrix (He was shouting 'Allah!' but I didn't hear that. It just sounded like a lot of crap to me.)
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To: M203M4

ok i ll bite. what is he looking at?


14 posted on 03/07/2008 1:26:43 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: MaxMax
12. You’ve ever had a crush on your neighbor’s goat.

You 'n me both.

15 posted on 03/07/2008 1:41:49 AM PST by MARTIAL MONK (I'm waiting for the POP!)
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To: beebuster2000

he’s looking at what’s in Mecca — a black meteorite that the M’s worship


16 posted on 03/07/2008 2:15:31 AM PST by Cronos ("Islam isn't in America to be equal to any other faith, but to become dominant" - Omar Ahmed, CAIR)
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To: Cronos

meaning that little window is looking in at the metoerite in the black tent that they walk around? how big is it?


17 posted on 03/07/2008 2:26:31 AM PST by beebuster2000 (choice is not not peace or war, but small war now, or big war later masquerading as peace now.)
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To: kajingawd

And then stone her to death for being “unclean.”


18 posted on 03/07/2008 2:50:19 AM PST by beckysueb (Pray for our troops , America, and President Bush)
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To: beebuster2000

“...the meteorite in the black tent that they walk around? how big is it?”

It appears to be the size of a bar of soap. Can you imagine the game of “keep away” they could have with it? God forbid one of them should let it fall to the ground.


19 posted on 03/07/2008 2:55:14 AM PST by equaviator ("There's a plane on the horizon coming in...see it?")
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To: Nachum

17. Your mother would be happier if you blew up into a million pieces.


20 posted on 03/07/2008 2:55:55 AM PST by bmwcyle (I am the watchman on the tower sounding the alarm.)
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