Hey y’all!
Here’s a thread...
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1965438/posts
...you might get a laugh out of...the Nigerian scammers have decided to pretend they’re Marines! They must have watched “Three Kings” one too many times!
And here’s a joke that was shared at Aircraft Resource Center today:
A group of country friends from Church wanted to get together on a regular basis to socialize, and play games. The lady of the house was to prepare the meal. When it came time for Al and Janet to be the hosts, Janet wanted to outdo all the others. Janet decided to have mushroom-smothered steak. However, knowing that mushrooms are so expensive, she told her husband, “No mushrooms; they are too high.”
He said, “Why don’t you go down in the pasture and pick some of those mushrooms? There are plenty in the creek bed.”
She said, “No, some wild mushrooms are poisonous.”
He said, “Well, I see varmints eating them, and they’re OK.”
So Janet decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch — washed, sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak. Then, she went out on the back porch and gave Ol’ Spot (the yard Dog) a double handful. Ol’ Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Janet watched Ol’ Spot and the wild mushrooms didn’t seem to affect him, so she decided to use them. The meal was a great success, and Janet even hired a helper lady from town to help her serve. She had on a white apron and a fancy little cap on her head. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and played Mexican dominoes.
About then, the helper lady from town came in and whispered in Janet’s ear, “Ms. Williams, Ol’ Spot just died.”
Janet went into hysterics. After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told him what had happened.
The doctor said, “That’s bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance, and I will be there as quick as possible. We’ll give everyone enemas, and we will pump out everyone’s stomach. Everything will be fine, just keep them calm.”
Soon, they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down the road. The EMTs and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump. One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped their stomach. After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, “I think everything will be fine now,” and he left.
They were all looking pretty weak sitting around the living room and about this time the helper lady came in and said, “You know, that fellow that ran over Ol’ Spot never even stopped.”
OMG!
No wonder I don’t like mushrooms!
Three people were visiting and viewing the Grand Canyon — an artist, a pastor and a cowboy. As they stood on the edge of that massive abyss, each one responded with a cry of exclamation. The artist said, “Ah, what a beautiful scene to paint!” The minister cried, “What a wonderful example of the handiwork of God!” The cowboy mused, “What a terrible place to lose a cow!”
Good morning, Mr S.....poor Ol’ Spot. LOL!