I Was An eBay Voldemort (A Hilarious Account Of Auctioning The Last "Harry Potter" Tome Alert)

National Review ^ | 07/19/2007 | Will Collier

[Xenalyte]

I’ll be taking a class for that later . . . I sorta taught myself how to knit earlier this year.

I am getting in touch with my inner old broad.

[Ingtar]

I got caught in a bad situation for a fan. I was asked to help prove that the photoed copy was not real. I looked at it briefly and noted that it was 22 pages shorter than what was announced as the size of the book. Only then did I start poking around in it and try to find things that would prove it a fake. Sadly, it turns out that the copy was likely real and I’ve seen more than I would have liked to see. I wish they had been more honest on the number of pages.

[bolobaby]

“The story wasn’t quite over after I dropped the book off at FedEx, of course. The Associated Press ran a story about the book’s release, noted my ad, and falsely claimed that I’d declined to respond to a query. That’s a lie: Even as I write this an hour or so after the AP’s story, I have not been contacted by them in any way—and if they actually try they’re going to get hung up on; lie about me and you lose interview rights.”

This guy is just figuring out that the AP lies?

Welcome to the desert of the real!

[LexBaird]

I am getting in touch with my inner old broad.

Does that mean you are gonna start driving a 1979 Cadillac at 5 MPH under the limit in the fast lane with your left blinker on? That's apparently mandatory for old broads here in LaLa land.

[weegee]

AP would be more shocked to find someone revealing that Saddam bought silence from Germany, France, and Russia prior to the Iraq war.

[Xenalyte]

Nah, I’m gonna be one a them old ladies what the drag queens like. Bright clothes, big sunglasses, and a ‘60s-type Caddy with HUGE tail fins.

(I will have restored the Caddy myself, and it will be hot pink with a zebra interior and a chain-link steerin’ wheel.)

[BibChr]

Um, so, you're on a thread about old women knitting?

Interesting.

(c;

[Xenalyte]

Oh, I am THIS close to being one of them old knittin’ women!

Knitting and crocheting are excellent for someone with nervous hands like me - they’re meditative and calming. Only trouble is, I can’t do either while driving.

[Steelerfan]

Not getting our copie early, but my wife is out of town when they are scheduled to arrive. Plan is to stay up late, read the whole thing, and then drop ambiguous questions and comments the whole time she is reading it.

Figure I will last about 48 hours before she kill me :)

[Ditter]

I missed the reason why DeepDiscount shipped the book 4 days early?

[Ditter]

LOL! You won’t be in the pink Caddie with the fins. Like a lot of younger people, you think that when you get old you will retro to an older style but that isn’t what will happen honey. You will be stuck in the style of your generation and the rest of the (younger) world will be movin’ on to newer styles.
Pink Cadillacs and Elvis, now that is my generation.

[Politicalmom]

No, no, no. Cross stitch rules. :p

[Xenalyte]

Ah, but I’ve wanted to restore a big ole car for years. All that’s stopping me are two lacks: garage space and a big ole junker to restore.

Being stuck in the style of my generation would be a fate worse than death . . . I came of age in the ‘80s! ;)

[Politicalmom]

At least it wasn’t the *70s*.

The 80s were cooler than that.

[Centurion2000]

First I would’ve called in sick for work and read the book non-stop until finished, then and only then I would’ve set the buy-it-now price at a grand.

Third, I'd have posted spoilers at some of the kookier Potter sites.

[Centurion2000]

The story wasn’t quite over after I dropped the book off at FedEx, of course. The Associated Press ran a story about the book’s release, noted my ad, and falsely claimed that I’d declined to respond to a query. That’s a lie: Even as I write this an hour or so after the AP’s story, I have not been contacted by them in any way—and if they actually try they’re going to get hung up on; lie about me and you lose interview rights.

Well, this is also libel.

[retrokitten]

I don’t think they have said why.

[apillar]

It seems that the book is floating around all over the place. Drudge had a story on Tuesday about how a photocopied version is all over the file sharing services. Drudge even posted a link to a site with complete spoilers, (which annoyed me because a read the first couple before I realized what I was reading)...

Also a word to Potter fans or those that have children that are. I would advise you to avoid the Internet, at least the chat rooms / message boards for the next few days. There seems to be a LOT of spoilers popping up since the photocopied version appeared.

[Ditter]

LOL! But that is where you will be.

Have you ever driven an old car? I had a Burgundy and white Pontiac (can’t remember the exact name) but the year was 1958. Big long sucker, like a barge, no A/c, horrible to park. Older than that cars had no power steering or power brakes, then there were the ones that had no automatic transmission. Restoring it might be fun but then you would want to sell the monster.

[Xenalyte]

No AC? WHOA.

I am rethinking my plan.

I bet that big burgundy-and-white Pontiac was way cool-lookin’, though!