Posted on 07/18/2007 9:01:07 AM PDT by charming_harmonica
Creators Syndicate - In a development that could complicate the Bush administration's position on immigration, millions of illegal immigrants over the past few days have sought an amnesty deal similar to the one obtained by the former chief of staff to Vice President Dick Cheney, I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby.
Just hours after President George W. Bush commuted Mr. Libby's prison sentence, news of the deal spread like wildfire through the illegal immigrant community, inspiring many who have sought amnesty to view Mr. Libby as a beacon of hope.
According to reports, immigration officials across the country have been deluged in recent days by illegal aliens willing to plead guilty to perjury in exchange for a deal similar to Mr. Libby's.
The former chief of staff's story has become so compelling, in fact, that Mr. Libby himself has become something of a folk hero to illegal immigrants across the United States
At a café in El Paso, Texas, illegal aliens referred to Mr. Libby reverentially as "El Libbre," loosely translated as "the free one."
"If I get an amnesty deal, I will owe it all to El Libbre." said Juan Carmelo Gutierrez, 35, who plans to plead guilty to perjury this week.
But "not so fast," says White House spokesman Tony Snow, who today tried to pour cold water on the plans of illegal immigrants hoping to follow in Mr. Libby's footsteps: "Before these folks expect to get Scooter's deal, they should ask themselves, 'Can I cut a check for $250,000?'"
Elsewhere, people with no lives have stopped waiting in line for the iPhone and started waiting in line for the new Harry Potter book.
I would have thought they’d ask for Sandy Berger’s deal - now that one was SWEET! Or how about Bubba’s? That one was even better than Sandy’s!
How about Clintoon’s deal for all drug smugglers?
Or Clintons deal for tax cheats?
Or Clintons deal for puerto rican terrorists?
“People with no lives have stopped waiting in line for an iphone and started waiting for the new harry potter book”
Tsk tsk.........
Sorry Charlie....
Anybody got a calculator than can register $250,000 times 12 million?
The president can pardon whom he pleases, and is required to pardon no one. Aside from being their usual loud, ridiculous selves, how can this latest ploy even get anyone’s attention?
But “not so fast,” says White House spokesman Tony Snow, who today tried to pour cold water on the plans of illegal immigrants hoping to follow in Mr. Libby’s footsteps: “Before these folks expect to get Scooter’s deal, they should ask themselves, ‘Can I cut a check for $250,000?’”
Hahahahahaha! Gotcha!
$3 Trillion. That’s a good start, but I still want a barrel of oil per day per Illegal from Mexico.
$3,000,000,000,000.00
Three trillion dollars could go a long way to helping our SS trust fund.
At the link this is clearly marked as satire.
In addition, clemency does not purge the underlying crime, rather, it only reduces the sentence and therefore, as convicted felons, they would lose just about any chance they might have to become legal.
Skimming this piece of work, I thought to myself: `Self, either this article really blows, or it’s just a liberal trying to be funny.’
Apparently it’s the latter.
Don’t forget Johnny Sutton’s deal for the drug smuggler who got shot in the buttocks.
LOL! Yeah, I like that idea!
ping
"Al Qaeda Seeks Puerto Rican FALN Terrorists' Deal"
Yeah, that would look great in the headlines.
It is getting harder and harder to tell satire from real life.
By the way, when is Johnathan Swift going to come out with a second edition his famous cookbook "A Modest Proposal". I'm getting tired of his recipes and want something new.
Liberal humorists seem to have one tool in the box: sarcasm.
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