25 sheets of toilet paper? Haven't you heard about how horrible TP is for Global Warming. I read in Sports Illustrated that it's bad, so it must be true.
Now, we need to know how many sherylcrows are in an issue of the New York Times. I cannot solve this at the moment because I don't have a copy of the Times and won't let one into the house. But I think the number will be pretty big. This means that the New York Times is destroying the earth. It is killing all those trees. It is ushering in global warming, and doing it a lot faster than the ladies can counteract by wiping with no more than two or three sherylcrows. Obviously, we have to persuade the ladies to rip up the New York Times and use that for tissues. This will save a LOT of sherylcrows. Heck, we might be able to save ol' earth just by not buying the New York Times!
I still have a good deal of research to do, but this is one scientific theory you can put in the bank.