I've always been fairly apathetic on the issue.. I think abortion is wrong of course, and that Roe was based on terribly tortured reasoning... I just can't wait until it's no longer the defining issue in American politics.
I don't know if it will ever be out of the debate in this country, since there will always be people on either side. Though I must say, it seems pretty clear which side is winning this debate.
The reason it is the (or one of the) defining issues is because we, the people, have never really had a chance to decide for ourselves. In Britain, where it's legal, it was determined by a vote of the people, once and for all. That's why it's not such a divisive issue there, or anywhere else really. Here, it was decided by judicial fiat, a proclamation on high, a concept antithetical and abhorrent to anyone who values a democratic form of government.
By this same token, it will always be just as divisive, until the issue is once again given to the states to decide for themselves, or a constitutional amendment is brought forth to ban it. Only then will the actual people feel like they have a say in it, and only then will the divison disappear.