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Raising the volume on what men think about feminism
The Age ^ | Sushi Das

Posted on 01/10/2006 1:49:22 AM PST by nickcarraway

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To: JasonC

Okay, man-haters are jerks. And woman-haters are jerks. All jerks should be avoided. That was easy.


581 posted on 01/11/2006 2:59:49 PM PST by NYpeanut (gulping for air, I started crying and yelling at him, "Why did you lie to me?")
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To: TAdams8591
We get back to respect earned. If they show they oppose feminism in deed, then I entirely agree with you, and I take the point. When instead they defend feminist pieties with flip cutsy comments and expect me to bow and scrap, they get both barrels.
582 posted on 01/11/2006 3:01:54 PM PST by JasonC
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To: JasonC

Then you need to pay a little visit to dictionary.com, or to ANY dictionary:

"mi·sog·y·nist ( P ) Pronunciation Key (m-sj-nst)
n.
One who hates women.

adj.
Of or characterized by a hatred of women. "

Nothing about feminists, denuciation, or feminism.


583 posted on 01/11/2006 3:03:26 PM PST by linda_22003
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To: HairOfTheDog
His treatment of American women as objects of sex to be thrown away was rude and contradicts ~everything~ the much vaulted conservative family values are supposed to be about.

For better or worse the "big tent" contains many people who don't subscribe to the planks of the Republican platform championed by the religious right.

And the majority of women who do uphold "conservative family values" are already off the market. Most of the marriageable (and I use that term loosely) women in the US tend to lean left, with all the incumbent baggage. Their own behavior in the singles scene is what brings out the negative attitude seen in some posters. They wouldn't be "disposable" if they didn't put out at the drop of a hat.

...ranting and raging and acting out ~exactly~ the kind of attitude about women he claims to hate about women.But no men here will say 'hey bully - that's not right to talk to her that way!'

I'm responding to comments directed to me. I've not yet read the posts by the Freeper you mentioned. But as I stated several hundred posts ago, just let these guys have a place to vent without adding fuel to the fire. Provoking and taunting just leads to more of the same, as well as more deeply entrenched animosities.

One would think that the "higher angels" of conservative women would direct them away from threads like this instead of y'all wading into the fray with both fists clenched.

But to rage and bully women here because some woman somewhere did them wrong is wrong. And it should be called wrong.

As long as you, with equal vigor, condemn the MSM and daytime / primetime television for unjustly bashing American men, I'll back you on that comment.

But I still don't think any of this is grounds to vilify men seeking foreign brides.

584 posted on 01/11/2006 3:05:46 PM PST by Freebird Forever (If they're truly public servants, why do they live in the mansions?)
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To: DH

>>"You can't have a conversation with a woman who can
>> never be wrong about anything."

My father, a wise man, told me "You cannot change the mind with logic, that was made up without the use thereof."

A wonderful quote, I tell it to those who are shrill, go on doing what I was doing while they try to figure out what it means :-).


585 posted on 01/11/2006 3:05:47 PM PST by DelphiUser ("You can lead a man to knowledge, but you can't make him think")
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To: JasonC

The backlash toward feminism has created men as mean and bitter as the feminists they dispise. And such men cause a lot of hurt and damage to TRADITIONAL women, who don't deserve it. This has been raging for a long time. With those tactics, you'll only create more feminists. And the cycle continues. That is NOT good.


586 posted on 01/11/2006 3:09:57 PM PST by TAdams8591 (The first amendment does NOT protect vulgar and obscene speech.)
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To: linda_22003
And you need to pay attention to the real world. There are Stalinist ideologues in the real world who manipulate language in studied ways with the deliberate purpose of sowing unreasoning division and hatred. And the best way to stop them is to wear their hate words as badges of honor, to defy the radiating pieties of language they attempt to exploit, and in so doing to defy them. As openly and bluntly as possible.
587 posted on 01/11/2006 3:10:41 PM PST by JasonC
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To: TAdams8591
You may be right, but frankly I am past caring how many feminists I might create by calling spades spades, just as I am past caring how many communists I might create by calling traitors traitors.

Those who damn themselves don't really need my help to side with everything awful. Anyone with the sense of proportion that stacks a little fire on an internet board against tens of millions of dead innocents and thinks the first outweighs the second, or outweighs tens of millions of broken families and all the accompanying human misery, and not only thinks that but feels all warm and righteous inside for so feeling - I really don't want on my side.

588 posted on 01/11/2006 3:15:37 PM PST by JasonC
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To: Freebird Forever
For better or worse the "big tent" contains many people who don't subscribe to the planks of the Republican platform championed by the religious right.

Actually, I know this. I'm not the religious right, although I still uphold values that say it's wrong to just use people with no remorse or responsibility. Maybe that's just me, but I don't think so.

And the majority of women who do uphold "conservative family values" are already off the market. Most of the marriageable (and I use that term loosely) women in the US tend to lean left, with all the incumbent baggage. Their own behavior in the singles scene is what brings out the negative attitude seen in some posters. They wouldn't be "disposable" if they didn't put out at the drop of a hat.

You act like all conservative marriagable women were born on the same day and are all gone, despite the constant births of new daughters every day.

But as I stated several hundred posts ago, just let these guys have a place to vent without adding fuel to the fire. Provoking and taunting just leads to more of the same, as well as more deeply entrenched animosities.

One would think that the "higher angels" of conservative women would direct them away from threads like this instead of y'all wading into the fray with both fists clenched.

Discussions of women, politics and relationships is of particular interest to conservative women, I'd think. And we've had ~good~ discussion about feminism, marriage, and relationships on this thread. It's not all about fists clenched. Those seeking a place to rant and bully are the ones who should be deemed out of place here, not those who are actually interested in discussing these issues with other conservatives.

589 posted on 01/11/2006 3:21:35 PM PST by HairOfTheDog (Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/ 1,000 knives and counting!)
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To: JasonC
"I might create by calling spades spades,"

You're NOT calling a spade a spade. You are falsely painting women on your team as the enemy. Learn to tell the difference.

" Anyone with the sense of proportion that stacks a little fire on an internet board against tens of millions of dead innocents and thinks the first outweighs the second, or outweighs tens of millions of broken families and all the accompanying human misery, and not only thinks that but feels all warm and righteous inside for so feeling - I really don't want on my side."

WHO does that???? Personally, I have been pro-life ALL my life, have at times been active in the movement, and have sacrificed much for the conservative cause. There are MANY PRO-LIFE WOMEN on this forum, many of whom have been ACTIVE in the movement all their lives and who have made many sacrifices for the pro-life cause.

590 posted on 01/11/2006 3:23:38 PM PST by TAdams8591 (The first amendment does NOT protect vulgar and obscene speech.)
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To: TAdams8591
So, are you in danger of becoming a feminist because my comments piss you off, or aren't you? If you aren't, then what are you shouting about, and why at me? Wasn't I supposed to be pushing some otherwise conservative women over the edge into defense of unspeakables, simply because their feathers couldn't take being told off on an internet bulletin board?

Also, are you defending the proposition that US men are blameworthy for looking to less feminist-ridden cultures, or do you sympathesize with some of them doing so? Because that was one of the positions I actually criticized. Are you defending the statement that this thread gives you a headache and makes you want to just go have some fun, or do you regard that as an attempt to impose feminist PC pieties on conservatives giving their honest opinions?

Why, in other words, do you think those I criticized as so all fired conservative, and that you are somehow advancing the cause of destroying feminism by defending those I've criticized? What solidarity or piety is it that makes the positions I criticize, more laudable than my own, which clearly bothers you for some reason?

591 posted on 01/11/2006 3:34:39 PM PST by JasonC
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To: TAdams8591
It is really very simple. You want me to pretend feminists on FR are my allies because they are on FR. I want them to stop pretending I have to bow to feminist pieties, which I utterly refuse to do. No one who insists I have to bow to feminist pieties in "on my team". I don't, and they are attempting to impose a ruinous ideology on us. If they are actually conservatives and actually on my team, they (and you, for that matter) can bloody well show it, by dropping the "you must bow to feminist PC pieties" crap. I needn't, and I don't, and anybody who tells me I must is an enemy not an ally. Learn it love it live it, or live with it.
592 posted on 01/11/2006 3:39:58 PM PST by JasonC
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To: NYpeanut
Exactly. Avoid jerks. And all feminists are jerks. Ergo avoid all feminists. As was to be demonstrated.
593 posted on 01/11/2006 3:54:50 PM PST by JasonC
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To: linda_22003
A commie reaches for the ad hominum, always a sign of having lost an argument. I'm 39, if that's young. Haven't been dumped. Haven't even been interested, for over a decade. Bachelor, and not looking to be otherwise. Don't need feminists, remember?
594 posted on 01/11/2006 3:59:27 PM PST by JasonC
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To: John O

John,

One thing that concerns me in all of your posts is that you are considering remarriage when this may not be in the best interest of your daughter. I understand that you want more kids, but why would you do that to your daughter. She would then live in a household with a woman who would treat her own children better than your daughter. Also, your daughter would lose part of you to another woman and these new children.

I personally think you should devote your non-work time to your daughter and not worry about getting remarried until she is grown. Your daughter has already lost her mom, she doesn't need to lose part of you.


595 posted on 01/11/2006 4:15:26 PM PST by luckystarmom
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To: Alkhin

I actually started out making more money than my engineer husband. I didn't know this until probably 6 months to a year of our dating. The thing is he went broke taking me on dates and paying for it. I'm real happy I married him. He's a good guy.


596 posted on 01/11/2006 4:20:52 PM PST by luckystarmom
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To: John O

Well, a President can and has lost my respect, Clinton.


597 posted on 01/11/2006 4:23:42 PM PST by luckystarmom
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To: Warren_Piece

That was beautiful. You are a real man!


598 posted on 01/11/2006 4:29:15 PM PST by luckystarmom
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To: luckystarmom; John O
She would then live in a household with a woman who would treat her own children better than your daughter.

You think this is necessarily true? I don't. I can't imagine showing preferences of one child over another, it's not part of my character, nor that of a loving person. A stepmom can be a vital nurturing parent, particularly in the absence of her real mom. (it's easier than a divorce situation where there is a live, 'real mom' to conflict with)

You know what I saw once on a remarriage that I really thought was a powerfully good idea? Vows, as part of the ceremony, from both bride and groom to the existing children. To love, respect and raise them as their own, indivisible. It was perhaps the most inclusive, committed way I've ever seen of including and acknowledging the children such marriages will affect. It made them feel a part of it. And it brought tears to my eyes it was so touching. So much better than the child sitting in the pews like a mere spectator.

My mother remarried when my brother and I were nearly grown, but her husband, my stepdad, bought a ring for her that had three diamonds on it. One for her, and one for each of her children. It was his wasy of acknowledging that he was marrying us all.

There are ways to make the kids feel a part of things, and acknowledged and cherished when all these big changes happen.

Anyway, JohnO... I bring these up as ideas to file away somewhere, hoping you'll have a wedding to plan someday... they're good ideas.

599 posted on 01/11/2006 4:37:30 PM PST by HairOfTheDog (Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/ 1,000 knives and counting!)
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To: Ninian Dryhope
Well, I hope I've done more than one thing right. But both of my boys definitely are. One of them just went over, so please keep him in your prayers.

Well, if stereotypes came out of individual minds, there would be no stereotypes, since everyone would have different opinions. ... And stereotypes can be changed, as circumstances change.

Good comment. I'll give you that. As long as we don't keep our stereotypes beyond their useful life and allow them to harden into bigotry or lazy thinking.

600 posted on 01/11/2006 4:42:35 PM PST by SuzyQue
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