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Weight Loss Program For Men

A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. As he
wondered how in the heck he would ever do that, he ran
across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT
LOSS PROGRAM.

"Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to
himself. But desperate, he called them up and
subscribed to the 3- day / 10 pound weight loss program.

The next day there was a knock on his door, and when he
answered, there stood before him a voluptuous, athletic,
19-year-old young lady dressed in nothing but air, some
Nike running shoes, and a sign around her neck.

She
introduces herself as a representative of the weight
loss company.

The sign read,

"If you can catch me, you can have me!"

Without a second thought he took off after
her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally
caught her and got the action he was hoping for. After
they were through and she left, he thought to himself,

"I like the way this company does business!" The same girl
showed up for the next two days and the same thing happened.

On the fourth day, he weighed himself and was delighted to
find he had lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He called the company and ordered their 5- day / 20 pound
program.

The next day there was a knock on the door and
there stood the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has
ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but Reebok running
shoes and a sign around her neck that read,

"If you catch me, you can have me."

He was out the door after her like a shot. This girl was in
excellent shape and it took him a while to catch her, but
when he did, it is worth every cramp and wheeze.

For the
next four days, the same routine happened.
Much to his
delight, on the fifth day, he weighed himself and found
he had lost another 20 lbs, as promised.

He decided to go for broke and called the company to order
the 7- day/ 50 pound program

"Are you sure?" asked the
representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous
program."

"Absolutely," he replied, "I haven't felt this
good in years"

The next day there was a knock at the door and when he
opened it he found a muscular guy standing there wearing
nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck
that read,

"If I catch you, you're mine."


1,907 posted on 01/04/2006 7:51:32 PM PST by Brad’s Gramma (Jesus is STILL the reason, and it's ALWAYS the Season!!!)
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To: All
I'm gonna knock off for the night.....
See y'all tomorrow...
G'Nite everybody.....
1,908 posted on 01/04/2006 7:58:25 PM PST by Fiddlstix (Tagline Repair Service. Let us fix those broken Taglines. Inquire within(Presented by TagLines R US))
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To: Brad's Gramma
A Hindu gets on a plane and sits next to a European.

As the plane takes off, he unrolls a wrapper containing Hindu vegetarian
food which smells so much that the European's nose twitches.

He turns to the man and says, "Food India" with a grin.

He then takes out a container containing the foulest smelling liquid
and again the man at the side has a twitching nose.

He grins sheepishly at the man and says, " Sorry. Drink India"

He then proceeds with his meal.

As soon as he has finished he farts. It is a loud, long fart.

He grins sheeepishly and says, "Air India"


1,909 posted on 01/04/2006 7:58:26 PM PST by Lady Jag (Honor - Dignity - Courage - Troll Consumption)
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