i couldn't care less about who watches me... it's out of common courtesy not offend those who could see me and be offended.
Posted on 12/06/2005 12:18:48 PM PST by billorites
If scientists from another planet were trying to understand us, our obsession with privacy during sex would make a good thesis project.
The aliens might have noticed that most humans prefer to copulate while hidden away - in our cozy bedrooms or perhaps on a desolate beach dappled with moonbeams. Much fuss ensues when someone chooses to perform mating behavior more publicly, say in a sex club, or in front of a University of Pennsylvania dormitory window.
Why, the aliens might wonder, would crowds of humans gather to watch and photograph a pair of other humans at Penn who repeatedly failed to draw their curtains before engaging in intercourse? Why were the mating pair then so distressed about attracting a slightly wider audience when pictures circulated on the Web showing their naked backsides making the beast with two backs, as Shakespeare would say.
All this happened in the wake of a scandal that started with Channel 3's secretly planting TV cameras in Philadelphia sex club Kama Sutra, outraging patrons who go there to get some privacy while they have sex in large rooms full of other people.
Both incidents open up huge anthropological and sociobiological questions. Most animals don't care whether anyone watches them mating. They neither seek out nor avoid an audience. What's with the humans?
In societies from the sands of the Kalahari to the tiniest Pacific Islands, the cultural preference is for sex in private, says Christopher Kovats-Bernat, an anthropologist at Muhlenberg College in Allentown. Where people can afford it, "we segregate off a space in the dwelling that is devoted to two things - sleeping and sex." In many parts of the world, however, the private bedroom is an unattainable luxury.
While members of Kama Sutra reportedly pay $100 for the privilege of having sex in front of other people, couples in Japan are paying to be alone. There, extended families pack into single-room apartments, so a cottage industry has sprung up to provide "love hotels," says Kovats-Bernat. These by-the-hour rentals cater mostly to married couples.
The Seriono people of Bolivia also like privacy, but they sleep in common rooms in rows of hammocks, he says. So if one couple starts having sex, the neighbors will politely turn the other way.
There's some evidence a similar practice takes place in American college dormitories (though perhaps not at Penn).
And yet, many subcultures exist in which people seek out a certain lack of privacy. In Jamaica, Kovats-Bernat said, strip clubs offer something called "freaky sex" in which men get up on stage, strip, and have sex with the dancers. Either way, we seem to care whether people are watching us or not, which makes us quite different from, say, dogs, who couldn't care less.
In his book Why Is Sex Fun?, UCLA professor and noted author Jared Diamond explains why you and your dog will never understand each other's sex lives. No self-respecting dog would need to hide while mating, he says. Dogs also refrain from sex unless the female is in her fertile phase.
According to Diamond's book, our ape relatives routinely have sex in group settings but, like dogs, only when the female is in estrus. While some promote the idea that sex is only for procreation, Diamond notes that that's much more the case with chimps and dogs, who aren't interested unless they're likely to conceive. Humans, for some reason, evolved so that men and women want to mate all month long even though women are fertile for only a few days, which are hard to identify.
Diamond connects our so-called concealed ovulation with our desire for concealed copulation and outlines a couple of theories explaining why they evolved. One suggests the urge for privacy arose because it prevents conflict and thereby encourages group cohesion needed for successful hunting and gathering.
Illustrating with a more modern example, he writes that if it were an everyday occurrence for people to go into heat, get naked and full-out copulate, say, on the office couch, we just wouldn't get that much work done.
Dogs just don't like you watching when they poop. You can just tell by the look on their faces. (Try it sometime)
because Coitus Interruptus by Police Officers is very annoying ...
When I was in college, I met this couple who had no problem having sex (And I mean lengthly sex) where ever they happen to be. I have to admit, it was a bit unnerving but, I got use to them. (the woman was WAY hot)
Uh, maybe because most of us look totally disgusting when we're having sex. We think we look like Jenna Jameson and Peter North, when most of us really resemble chimpanzees in heat. Yeek!
i couldn't care less about who watches me... it's out of common courtesy not offend those who could see me and be offended.
Once at the zoo I saw two monkeys having sex. The funny thing was that the male monkey would frequently pause in his humping and look around as if checking to see if any of the other monkeys had noticed what was happening. So it looked as if this other animal would have preferred privacy if he could find it. I guess this all had something to do with monkey social structure.
ew.. isn't that burglekutt on the right?
"Why do humans prefer to have sex in private?"
Because humans have a sense of aesthetics?
Oops! Speak for yourself Army.
Some things are best accomplished alone.
Lord Chesterton
"so a cottage industry has sprung up to provide "love hotels," says Kovats-Bernat. These by-the-hour rentals cater mostly to married couples."
Hey, we have those here in the USA, too. They're motels located on the edge of most cities in the country. They're usually a little run-down, cheap, and populated for only part of the night.
The Hot Sheet Hotel, Inc.
A lot of people have been known to have sex alone. Go figure.
Well, in my case it's because I'm afraid someone will steal my whip collection and rubber boots while I'm preoccupied in the pool full of lime jello...
My Yorky use to give us the nasty look if we didn't turn away while he was doing his duty.
I guess you must have stayed in one of these places to know that.
Gaijin (foreigners) looking for a cheap place to stay.
I guess you must have stayed in one of these places to know that.
Gaijin (foreigners) looking for a cheap place to stay.
I prefer to have sex in private because I don't want to give away the arcane secret that makes all my partners my love slaves for the rest of their lives.
If you are a hottie and want to experience my mystical powers, send a private reply.
Er...sometimes it takes a few weeks before the powers really kick in, but honest, I wouldn't kid you.
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