Posted on 10/23/2005 5:06:47 PM PDT by luv2ndamend
The Americans came in killing like mad men, I never thought I would say this, but life was better with Adolf Hitler.
June 6th, 1944 — Normandy
Around three hundred French civilians were murdered yesterday and an undetermined number were injured during the first hours of the American invasion of continental Europe. Most of the French victims were due to artillery shots coming from the American fleet that was trying to hit German fortifications on the coast before thousands of soldiers proceeded to land on several of the beaches.
According to sources in the improvised hospital in the town of Saint Mere Eglise, the slaughter was worse than French and Germans anticipated. “We are dropping like flies” said an eye witness who preferred to remain anonymous. “The Americans came in killing like mad men, I never thought I would say this, but life was better with Adolf Hitler.”
According to information coming from the front, the American invasion caused serious environmental damage. The army brigade that landed on the beaches is equipped with tanks, trucks and war machinery that destroyed several kilometers of coastline and thousands of hectares of very ecologically interesting wetlands. It is believed that the lazy crab’s habitat, native to this part of France, has been totally devastated; biologists warned the species might disappear
A Bluepeace representative was very dismayed, reporting his organization had warned about this military operation at least a year ago. “This disaster is just another example of how little attention the American military establishment pays to the environment.” “We have no doubt the powerful industrial-military lobby’s interests, protected by the White House, are behind the landing” said the environmentalist spokesperson Petra Cheekyface.
Yesterday, during a mid-night press conference in a New York hotel, Jacques Lefrenchie, one of the members of the exiled French Government said that the savage invasion was brought on by American beer multinationals’ greed, thirsting to invade European markets. “Everybody knows President Roosevelt has his own agenda and his own drinking clientele”, “once the German companies established in France are taken, Yankee beer will control the world market”.
Unofficial sources connected to the Roosevelt administration admit the harshness of the intervention, which they say was based on information provided by Albert Einstien, a German scientist who sent a letter to the President in order to warn him of the possibility of the Nazis developing the ultimate weapon known as the “atom bomb.”
The effect such weapon would be terrible and cause an unheard of number of victims. Just one explosion would kill thousands and devastate the atmosphere. Hitler has, on many occasions, denied having this “bomb,” something international inspectors confirmed while traveling in the Reich for two weeks.
Shortly after the invasion started, cases of abuse against German soldiers captured after the landing have been reported. These abuses violate the Geneva Agreement on prisoners of war. In the meantime, rumors persist about supposed mistreatment the Germans are inflicting on the Central European Jews in the so-called “concentration camps,” but nothing has been proved yet.
It might look like it, but this is not a joke. Today, seventy years after the landing, this fictitious news report would be real, it would be in every newspaper and everyone would blindly believe it.
Fernando Díaz Villanueva is a member of the Instituto Juan de Mariana and also works for the Spanish Herald
Ain't that the truth!
Yup!
(Sad to say)
Get a life.
UY
The media is the enemy of soldiers everywhere. Ask the troops involved with the Australian reporter in Afghanistan and the burning bodies. These American troops are now the subject of a world wide, politically correct witch hunt that even includes Rumsfeld.
My recommendation for dealing with reporters:
Dont hang with them if they are embedded with you.
Dont confide in them.
Dont help them.
Dont trust them.
Dont fall for their smiles and "brotherly" attitude.
Dont allow them to take vids or pics if you dont want the world to see them.
Dont let them sucker you into believing they are "one of us."
Do leave them on the side of the road at the first chance.
Let them explain to the approaching Muslim murderers that being a reporter should be considered more important than being an American.
Brothers, consider yourselves warned.
Thanks for the post, excellent satire with a truthful ending...
Enjoy my FRiends!
I would (dan)rather see the original version instead of the revisionist one.
I think Carl Rove could have used the same advice a while back.
They lose that many on a warm (compared to Texas heat) summer day. If man descended from Apes, the French came from Jellyfish. No backbone, delicate and unmotivated.
Remember, the Germans not only did not evacuate the French from the area, they didn't let them leave either.
There are some pretty big numbers involved in D-Day but no one ever mentions them.
Today, seventy years after the landing, this fictitious news report would be real, it would be in every newspaper and everyone would blindly believe it.
______________________________________________________
Not quite, if the US we allied with Joe Stalin and the old Soviet Union today as in 1944, the left in the US would sign on just as quickly. That is the fundamental difference between WWII and all other wars.
No doubt.
It would be nice if there were a hunting season too.
That's one wicked and evil and funny FERNANDO!
The numbers killed during the fighting in Normandy around Caen and in the bocage country takes the toll much higher.Simply publicising those casualty numbers, even without the satirical prose, should make reasonable people view the destruction in Iraq in a more objective manner
“The Americans came in killing like mad men, I never thought I would say this, but life was better with Adolf Hitler.”
Those crazy Americans...they should remember to be gentlemen in war (anything else wouldn't be PC).
But the world under Uncle Wolfie...I don't know? He's filled with hate. He's a psychopath.
I think I might choose those crazy Americans instead.
CBS is probably gearing up to report this as factual now.
The war aims were very clear.
There is a lot of a difference between then and now.
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