Posted on 11/29/2004 1:59:05 PM PST by Clive
My fella and I were going out of town. He was driving his "super reliable" car into which he pours nothing less than premium gas and synthetic oil and which, incidentally, is so much better and safer than my car that the two can never even be compared.
To boot, his car just got a tune-up and that became the launching point for a lecture about car maintenance habits and how I do not have any.
He should know. He's been working on my car all weekend. So blah, blah, I never check my oil (I forget), my tire pressure (um, my tire pressure measuring stick is broken), my radiator fluid (as if I even know where my radiator fluid is ...) and so on and so forth.
In fact, my car is in such shoddy shape, I should not even drive it anymore. Instead, I should just drive his car (which I'll simply refer to as super reliable from now on) but I have to remember not to start it in second gear because that WRECKS HIS CLUTCH.
In passing, my car-savvy fella mentioned that during his tune-up, the mechanic told him to consider replacing an ignition module or something of that sort. The mechanic, my fella concludes, is probably wrong and there is no problem with the car.
You should listen to the mechanic, I said, using up all the car advice I felt authorized to give. With your luck (he has the worst luck of anyone I know) the car will break down in the middle of a road trip and you'll be stuck there forever.
About 45 minutes later we were sitting on the side of the highway with the hazard lights on waiting for a tow truck.
That's right, Mr. Awesome-car-care-premium-gas-guy was digging around under the hood swearing and, to make matters worse, we gave the tow truck the wrong directions and were stranded for almost two hours at sub-zero temperatures in a car that would not start.
Two hundred bucks later, super reliable was in the shop and is there still, waiting for several hundred bucks worth of parts and labour.
In the meantime, the car's owner is driving my car (the one that does not have enough radiator fluid, the back doors do not open and is, overall, totally unreliable) to work.
Before I point out why this episode confirmed my attitude towards vehicles, consider this.
A couple of years ago I was driving my super junky K-Car along Highway 2.
I was just past Leduc when my tire seemingly exploded.
I pulled over, stupidly, on the left side of the highway and immediately realized I was stuck in the middle of six lanes of whizzing highway traffic.
I got out of the car, examined the tire (yep, it was flat) and pondered what to do next. I decided to walk to Nisku and call someone.
But before the traffic subsided for long enough to cross to the other side of the highway, some guy had already pulled over, put on my spare and asked me out for coffee.
Now I know I should learn how to change a flat and check my air tire pressure, but where's my incentive?
Obviously obsessive car maintenance, synthetic oil and all, does not eliminate breaking down on the side of the road.
Furthermore, if all of a sudden I learned to care about my spark plugs or my air filter, then so many guys would be deprived of the car-related lectures and rescues in which they secretly delight.
Besides, not knowing anything about cars means I generally listen to my mechanic when he says something needs to be fixed.
And let's face it, if it had been me driving ol' super reliable when it broke down, I could have got a ride back to town, and probably coffee, instead of trying not to die from the frost while waiting for the tow truck.
I suspect a poorly-placed wire in the dome light circuit has chafed through its insulation, providing a short to ground. There's no easy way to find it. I'd check all the domelight bulbs for a broken bulb, but you probably won't find one. You'd want to find the appropriate wires in the wire harness and follow them along, from fusebox to light module to door switch to light (YMMV), looking for bare copper. That's going to mean pulling trim and upholstery, maybe even pulling the door trim panel. Ugh.
To tell the truth, I'd trade it with that fault and let the garage deal with the hassle of finding the short.
That bug is sweet. Nice color, too.
That reminds me that I once smelled gasoline as I turned onto the highway to go home from work. The smell kept getting stronger and stronger, until I saw a wet pavement and then saw a car leaking large amounts of gasoline in front of me. I got on the left side of that car and I could clearly see a serious leak from somewhere in front of the right rear wheel. I finally got the driver's attention and told him that his car was leaking gasoline.
I'd bet that the leak was from a loose fuel filter connection, since it was a Ford product and a lot of those have the fuel filter in that location. He'd probably recently had it replaced and whomever did it reused the old fuel line clips (which is a no-no).
What blew my mind was that this guy had been driving on this highway for at least 5 miles and not a single person besides me informed him of this potentially explosive situation.
What if he'd been sitting at a light and someone tossed a cigarette out the window?
Yeah, it's pretty much out of our expertise, that's for sure...it's an Aerostar and it's very hard to work on.
I imagine we'll get it fixed and then try to sell it.
Might want to check the domelight socket itself for damage causing the power wire or terminal to short to ground.
Also, bulbs have been known to short out without glass breakage. I had that happen to a nightlight bulb in my house, it tripped the breaker.
yeah, luckily its been a mild autumn since i dont have the cash to switch the air in my tires, actually my sister got tricked with the blinker fluid gag, then when her O2 sensor went out she argued with the mechanic that he was lying to her since there was no reason a car would need to breath.
See 65.
Do you know where your first car is? Bet not. Good Hunting... from Varmint Al
My first car in high school in early 70s... 1964 Valiant 225 Slant-6 with push-button drive. Great car. Durable. Formerly owned by a physician with CUTE daughter 2 years younger. Wanted to sit in car during lunch many days. (Of course, I let her! think I'm a total dolt?)
brittish leyland?? which one?? i have a 73 austin 1001, learned everything i know about cars with that thing!
Just kidding.
What's your point? LOL
During the split second before the fuse blows, the lights work...the open door chime too. They wouldn't work, would they? If there was a problem there?
We found the problem fuse last week and replaced it...I drove it for two days before it shorted out again. Now it just shorts out right away.
OIL CHANGE
Oil Changing Instructions for Women:
1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3,000 since the last oil change.
2) Drink a cup of coffee.
3) Fifteen minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle.
Money spent: $20.00 for oil change
$1.00 for coffee
Total = $21.00
Oil Change instructions for Men:
1) Go to Auto Parts Place and write a check for $50.00 for oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree.
2) Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking it back to O'Reilly's to recycle, dump in hole in back yard.
3) Open a beer and drink it.
4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7) Place drain pan under engine.
8) Look for 9/16 box-end wrench.
9) Give up and use crescent wrench.
10) Unscrew drain plug.
11) Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil. Spill hot oil on self in process.
12) Clean up mess.
13) Have another beer while watching oil drain.
14) Look for oil filter wrench.
15) Give up; poke oil filter with screwdriver and twist off.
16) Beer.
17) Buddy shows up; finish case of beer with him. Finish oil change tomorrow.
18) Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
19) Throw kitty litter on oil spilled during step 18.
20) Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.
21) Walk to 7-Eleven; buy beer.
22) Install new oil filter, making sure to apply a thin coat of oil to gasket surface.
23) Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24) Remember drain plug from step 11.
25) Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
26) Discover that the used oil is buried in a hole in the backyard, along with drain plug.
27) Drink beer.
28) Uncover hole and sift for drain plug.
29) Discover that the first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor.
30) Drink beer.
31) Slip with wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame.
32) Bang head on floorboards in reaction to step 31.
33) Begin cussing fit.
34) Throw wrench.
35) Beer.
36) Clean up hands and forehead and bandage as required to stop blood flow.
37) Beer.
38) Beer.
39) Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.
40) Beer.
41) Lower car from jack stands.
42) Accidentally crush one of the jack stands.
43) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during step 23.
44) Beer.
45) Test-drive car.
46) Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence.
47) Car gets impounded.
48) Make bail: Get car from impound yard.
Money spent:
$50.00 parts
$25.00 beer
$75.00 replacement set of jack stands $1,000.00 bail
$200.00 impound and towing fee
Total = $1,350.00
And don't forget to have the muffler bearings checked!
There was a rebuilding a VW engine for dummies book, too.
I had a Ghia. Lots of fun.
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