Posted on 10/28/2004 12:15:23 AM PDT by MadIvan
SOUNDBITES have no greater enemy than John Kerry.
While all politicians pledge to remove spin from politics, the Democratic presidential candidate has gone one further: he is murdering one-liners on sight.
To the dismay of his speechwriters, Mr Kerrys attempts to "make it real" at rallies has led him to ramble so much that any snappy phrases composed for him are drowned in a sea of verbosity.
The result has presented journalists with a problem when covering his remarks - should they stick to the intended script or report the mess of platitudes Mr Kerry utters?
During one speech, Mr Kerrys script writers had crafted the concise pledge: "I will work with Republicans and Democrats on this healthcare plan, and we will pass it."
In the candidates hands it became: "I will work with Republicans and Democrats across the aisle, openly, not with an ideological, driven, fixed, rigid concept, but much like Franklin Roosevelt said, I dont care whether a good idea is a Republican idea or a Democrat idea. I just care whether or not its gonna work for Americans and help make our country stronger.
"And we will pass this bill. Ill tell you a little bit about it in a minute, and Ill tell you why well pass it, because its different from anything weve ever done before, despite what the Republicans want to try to tell you."
The Massachusetts senator, who has spent his life with an eye for political office, is showing daily refusal to read simple declarations, preferring to ad-lib.
It can be a simple statement of the obvious - "thats whats at stake in this election" - or an attempt at adding the evangelical at random - "we can just hope and pray".
His scriptwriters snappy attack on Mr Bushs healthcare plan - "Dont get sick" - became: "And dont get sick. Just pray, stand up and hope, wait - whatever. We are all left wondering and hoping. Thats it."
Ping!
Has anyone else noticed that newspapers have been mentioning Free Republic lately?
Kerry is too stupid to tie his own shoes.
Luckily, he had an instinct to marry wealthy women, so he could have the butlers tie his shoes for him.
The MSM doesn't know where to put the lipstick on this pig!~
There are some funny quotes in this. Kerry talks in torrents
when he should be throwing thunderbolts. No danger of him doing so.
Hoi Ivan! :) Nice read!
ROFL!
What can it possibly be like in side that head of his?
Do you really want to know? I certainly don't. :)
Regards, Ivan
"What can it possibly be like in side that head of his?"
H.P. Lovecraft comes to mind.....:)
Now we know why they wouldn't let him into Harvard Law School.
Well, for myself, I hear the Twilight theme song.
This loose cannon on the deck of the ship of state can bode nothing but ill.
Washington, Pa.(in Washington County) Home of Washington & Jefferson College.
The Vice President was eloquent. Two of his great oneliners come to mind.
1.You live in the first County in America to be named after our first President. Of course his friends called him George W.
2.I know there are a lot of hunters here, did any of you have to borrow a cammo jacket to shoot a goose?
Don't underestimate him.
HE HAS A PLAN!!!!
Haven't you listened to him? LoL!
John Kerry IS a sea of verbosity!!!........
ROFL!!!! Thanks so much for posting this, it's the funniest thing I've read all day.
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