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C-BS (Ann Coulter)
WND.com ^ | September 15,2004 | Ann Coulter

Posted on 09/15/2004 4:47:25 PM PDT by perfect stranger

Why do TV commentators on CBS' forgery-gate insist on issuing lengthy caveats to the effect that of course this was an innocent mistake and no one is accusing Dan Rather of some sort of "conspiracy," and respected newsman Dan Rather would never intentionally foist phony National Guard documents on an unsuspecting public merely to smear George Bush, etc., etc.?

I'll admit, there's a certain sadistic quality to such overwrought decency toward Dan Rather. But how does Bill O'Reilly know what Dan Rather was thinking when he put forged documents on the air? I know liberals have the paranormal ability to detect racism and sexism, but who knew O'Reilly could read an anchorman's mind just by watching him read the news?

What are the odds that Dan Rather would have accepted such patently phony documents from, say, the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth?

As we now know, CBS' own expert told them there were problems with the documents – the main one being that they were clearly fakes dummied up at a Kinko's outlet from somebody's laptop at 4 a.m.

According to ABC News, document examiner Emily Will was hired by CBS to vet the documents. But when she raised questions about the documents' authenticity and strongly warned CBS not to use the documents on air, CBS ignored her. Will concluded: "I did not feel that they wanted to investigate it very deeply."

Within hours of the documents being posted on CBS' website, moderately observant fourth-graders across America noticed that the alleged early '70s National Guard documents were the product of Microsoft Word. If that wasn't bad enough, The New York Times spent the following week hailing Rather for his "journalistic coup" in obtaining the documents that no other newsman had (other than Jayson Blair).

By now, all reputable document examiners in the Northern Hemisphere dispute the documents' authenticity. Even the Los Angeles Times has concluded that the documents are fraudulent – and when you fail to meet the ethical standards of the L.A. Times, you're in trouble.

In Dan Rather's defense, it must be confessed, he is simply a newsreader. Now that Walter Cronkite is retired, Rather is TV's real-life Ted Baxter without Baxter's quiet dignity. No one would ever suggest that he has any role in the content of his broadcast. To blame Dan Rather for what appears on his program would be like blaming Susan Lucci for the plot of "All My Children."

The person to blame is Ted Baxter's producer, Mary Mapes. Mapes apparently decided: We'll run the documents calling Bush a shirker in the National Guard, and if the documents turn out to be fraudulent we'll:

a) Blame Karl Rove; b) Say the documents don't matter.

But if the documents are irrelevant to the question of Bush's Guard duty, then why did CBS bring them up? Why not just say: "The important thing is for you to take our word for it!"

Interestingly, the elite (and increasingly unwatched) media always make "mistakes" in the same direction. They never move too quickly to report a story unfavorable to liberals.

In 1998, CNN broadcast its famous "Tailwind" story, falsely accusing the U.S. military of gassing American defectors in Laos during the Vietnam War. (This was part of liberals' long-standing support for "the troops.") The publishing industry regularly puts out proven frauds such as: "I, Rigoberta Menchu" (a native girl's torture at the hands of the right-wing Guatemalan military), "Arming America: The Origins of a National Gun Culture" (a liberal fantasy of a gun-free colonial America), "Fortunate Son: George W. Bush and the Making of an American President" (a book by a convicted felon with wild stories of George Bush's drug use), and the unsourced nutty fantasies of Kitty Kelley.

In a book out this week, Kelley details many anonymous charges against the Bush family, such as that Laura Bush was a pot dealer in college, George W. Bush was the first person in America to use cocaine back in 1968, and he also regularly consorted with a prostitute in Texas who was then silenced by the CIA.

Kelley backs up her shocking allegations with names of highly credentialed people – who have absolutely no connection to the events she is describing. No one directly involved is on the record, and the people on the record have never met anyone in the Bush family. In other words, her stories have been "vetted" enough to be included on tonight's "CBS Evening News" with Dan Rather.

The New York Times review blamed Kelley's gossip mongering on "a cultural climate in which gossip and innuendo thrive on the Internet." Kelley has been writing these books for decades, so apparently, like the Texas Air National Guard, Kelley was on the Internet – and being influenced by it – back in the '70s. As I remember it, for the past few years it has been the Internet that keeps dissecting and discrediting the gossip and innuendo that the major media put out.

Curiously, all this comes at the precise moment that speculation is at a fever pitch about whether Kitty Kelley is in the advanced stages of syphilis. According to the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases: "Approximately 3 percent to 7 percent of persons with untreated syphilis develop neurosyphilis, a sometimes serious disorder of the nervous system."

Dr. Jonathan Zenilman, M.D., associate professor of medicine at Johns Hopkins University, has found there is an "inter-relationship" between STDs and truck routes in Baltimore. I'm not at liberty to reveal the names of my sources, but there are three or four highly placed individuals in the publishing industry who say Miss Kelley or someone who closely resembles her is a habitue of truck routes in Baltimore.

While opinions differ as to whether Miss Kelley's behavior can be explained by syphilis or some other STD, people who went to Harvard – and Harvard is one of the top universities in the nation – say her path is consistent with someone in the advanced stages.

Amid the swirling dispute over her STDs, there is only one way for Kelley to address this issue: Release her medical records. As someone who would like to be thought of as her friend said anonymously: "For your own good, Ms. Kelley, I would get those medical records out yesterday." This doesn't have to be public. She may release her medical records to me, or if she'd be more comfortable, to my brothers.

Since TV commentators have assured me that Dan Rather is an equal opportunity idiot, Kelley had better clear all this up before someone slips this column to CBS. As a precaution, I've written this on a 1972 Selectric typewriter.


TOPICS: Government; Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: anncoulter; coulter; marymapes; seebs
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1 posted on 09/15/2004 4:47:25 PM PDT by perfect stranger
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To: perfect stranger

mmm... ann


2 posted on 09/15/2004 4:49:37 PM PDT by Crazieman (Hanoi John Effin Kerry. War Criminal. Traitor. Democrat.)
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To: perfect stranger

Because they are covering ther own butts in case they ever screw up... thats my guess...


3 posted on 09/15/2004 4:51:06 PM PDT by FesterUSMC
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To: perfect stranger
...moderately observant fourth-graders across America noticed that the alleged early '70s National Guard documents were the product of Microsoft Word.

Buckhead!

4 posted on 09/15/2004 4:53:55 PM PDT by Doomonyou (Molon Labe! FMCDH!)
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To: perfect stranger
Rather is TV's real-life Ted Baxter without Baxter's quiet dignity

What a great line.

What a great story. Ann knocks it out of the park again.

5 posted on 09/15/2004 4:54:32 PM PDT by Rum Tum Tugger
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To: perfect stranger

I am not sure about her comment about any fourth grader could recognize these were phoney. Then again my daughter in fifth grade can probably identify several dozen different fonts, but then again she has no idea what a typewriter is.


6 posted on 09/15/2004 4:54:56 PM PDT by Always Right
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To: perfect stranger

I love this woman.


7 posted on 09/15/2004 4:55:58 PM PDT by TheGeezer
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To: perfect stranger
CBS

Cock
and
Bull
Story

8 posted on 09/15/2004 4:58:29 PM PDT by Nachum (Kerry spells "Fine Dining")
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To: Ann Coulter; hellinahandcart; NYC GOP Chick; Lil'freeper

Great article m'lady.

From this moderately observant fourth grader.


9 posted on 09/15/2004 4:59:08 PM PDT by sauropod (Hitlary: "We're going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good.")
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To: perfect stranger
"The Internet...keeps dissecting and discrediting the gossip and innuendo that the major media put out.
~Ann Coulter~

10 posted on 09/15/2004 4:59:39 PM PDT by Savage Beast (The internet is the newspaper of record.)
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To: perfect stranger
Here is the latest from the DUmmies on Memogate. Read and LAUGH:

Seriously my humble take on this is that even is the documents are forged it is the press's duty to stay on story which are the multitude of lies in GW Bush's military record. If this 86 year old grandma goes on and on about how she recalls waht a rule breaKER, SLACK OFF, AWOL DRUNK NO SHOW HE WAS --ONCE AGAIN THE WH HAS A PROBLEM. Not every independent or fence sitter is going to suck this up and blame Dan Rather...

why couldn't the documents be forgeries? Rovian attempt to get Rather Compared to the rest of the presstitutes, Rather has become a bit of a thorn in the side of the Bushies. Sixty Minutes has also been out in front of the herd of lapdogs. Why WOULDN'T a Rove type set a trap, with faked documents, to try to snare Rather?

I yelled at Dan saying, "Dan, you are my HERO!!!!!!!!!!!

Sure hope Dan-the-Man lobs a THUTH grenade into the whoring cabal of scum

I hope ALL the media in this country is watching this unfold. Dan Rather is giving them a lesson on what reporting is supposed to be.

I am now officially in love with Dan Rather.

If CBS had backed down in the face of intimidation, the bullies would be crawling all over the network's corpse now, and we Democrats would have made another crucial tactical error. We have to defend the truth, even if it is a minor truth. If we give in to bullying, we've lost.

Here's the email I sent: Thank you, Dan Rather, for being one of the last true journalists of courage and integrity remaining on the planet! Those of us who still value Truth over Propaganda respect and applaud you! Please, oh please, continue your efforts and set the example for your fellow "journalists" who routinely cede to the pressures of the Bush Administration and become complicit in spreading their lies and obfuscations. You, sir, are a true Hero! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Way to go Dan, my respect for this man just keeps growing. I just hope he really has the goods. I suspect he does, but man if he doesn't.......

I have two things to say: 1. Thank you, Mr. Rather; and.... 2. Have you no shame, Mr. Bush? Just answer the questions.

I get the feeling Dan has lived for this moment for years now, he's kept rather quiet, careful not to rock the boat too much. For the last five years, people have wondered, why is he still hanging on. Sometimes he looked so tired. But now, when American is at her darkest hour, Dan is taking off the mask and putting his cards on the table. He knows more sh*t about this cabal, then most of us put together. He has been there since the beginning and he has seen it all.

Could CBS have the originals as well? Maybe they were hoping bush would deny the charges and then they could present the real docs and REALLY hang his ass? This gets more and more strange...yesterday I thought it was a Rove's trick but CBS is not backing down so they must have something to back themselves up. Frankly it looks like they want to force bush co into a courtroom or congressional hearing????

I want Dan Rather to unleash the fury NOW!!!!

The documents could be true in content but unauthentic from the standpoint that they are not the original documents and have been reproduced.

11 posted on 09/15/2004 4:59:56 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (What's the Forgery, Dan!!!???)
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To: perfect stranger

THIS is Ann at the top of her game....WOW!


12 posted on 09/15/2004 5:01:03 PM PDT by Lancey Howard
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To: perfect stranger

Is she not the sexiesrt woman in politics?


13 posted on 09/15/2004 5:02:47 PM PDT by zetapsi (Easy Choice)
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To: perfect stranger

>>Why do TV commentators on CBS' forgery-gate insist on issuing lengthy caveats to the effect that of course this was an innocent mistake and no one is accusing Dan Rather of some sort of "conspiracy,"<<

Sean "My good friend Lanny Davis" Hannity said this very day that he thinks Dan was an innocent dupe.

Riiiiight.


14 posted on 09/15/2004 5:03:26 PM PDT by SerpentDove (I love HDTV...now I can count Dan Rather's sweat beads.)
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To: perfect stranger

Go Ann. Sitting on the flagstone porch steps in high heels heftin' the rifle. Although I see it doesn't have a scope, this shot reminds me of the "you're a redneck" joke: "if you've ever used the scope on your rifle to look for the kids."


15 posted on 09/15/2004 5:03:54 PM PDT by Pearls Before Swine
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To: perfect stranger
There are too many pearls in this one to list them all, but here's a few of my favorites:

Even the Los Angeles Times has concluded that the documents are fraudulent – and when you fail to meet the ethical standards of the L.A. Times, you're in trouble.

Now that Walter Cronkite is retired, Rather is TV's real-life Ted Baxter without Baxter's quiet dignity.

Kelley backs up her shocking allegations with names of highly credentialed people – who have absolutely no connection to the events she is describing. No one directly involved is on the record, and the people on the record have never met anyone in the Bush family. In other words, her stories have been "vetted" enough to be included on tonight's "CBS Evening News" with Dan Rather.

Curiously, all this comes at the precise moment that speculation is at a fever pitch about whether Kitty Kelley is in the advanced stages of syphilis.

16 posted on 09/15/2004 5:05:59 PM PDT by Lancey Howard
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To: perfect stranger
Good stuff Ann, but this...

fourth-graders

I understand your intent, but the implication about Freepers... :(

17 posted on 09/15/2004 5:06:19 PM PDT by nsc68
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To: perfect stranger
"It's not so much fun when the rabbit has the gun." - Ann Coulter, Slander Heeheee.. SeeBS
18 posted on 09/15/2004 5:07:56 PM PDT by Diva Betsy Ross (It's not Bush's fault... it's the media's fault!)
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To: perfect stranger
Hi, Ann!


19 posted on 09/15/2004 5:08:09 PM PDT by Lancey Howard
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To: perfect stranger
and when you fail to meet the ethical standards of the L.A. Times, you're in trouble.

hehehehehe

20 posted on 09/15/2004 5:09:58 PM PDT by Graybeard58 (Graybeard - Illinois resident - Keyes voter)
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