Minding the baby; Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain

The Guardian UK ^ | 17 July 2004 | Rebecca Abrams

[Lorianne]

Another article on the same research/book:

Cradle of civilisation

http://politics.guardian.co.uk/comment/story/0,9115,1268296,00.html

[Libertarianize the GOP]

BTTT!

[Lorianne]

Yes, this research is fascinating and very compelling. The first 6 months seem to be absolutely critical.

[Burn24]

Thank you for posting. I will read this book.

[grellis]

He can even pick out his mother through his sense of smell.

I kept an unlaundered (not filthy, but unlaundered) shirt of mine handy when my boys were newborns. They napped longer if it was in their crib with them.

So, Kiki, what's the oddest advice you've had so far??!

[hershey]

Finally, someone stating the truth about this. It's simple common sense and very nonPC.

[hershey]

That's such a great idea! And simple, too.

[grellis]

I wish I could remember who tipped me off to trying it. I'm not nearly smart enough to have come up with it!

[Capriole]

Babies who don't learn to regulate through their moms, through lots of attention and holding, grow up to be HYPERACTIVE

You know you're not allowed to say that on this forum. Everyone will jump on you and insist that hyperactivity is a myth, just a sign that the parents haven't beaten their child enough.

[TaxRelief]

I read a different study (10 years ago) that attributed the increased cortisol in daycare babies to inadequate quantities of sleep and quiet periods. (Daycare is simply too noisy. Parents keep babies awake in the evenings.) The babies who slept through "anything" did not have the cortisol problem.

I'll try to did that one out...

[SouthernFreebird]

Babies who don't learn to regulate through their moms, through lots of attention and holding, grow up to be HYPERACTIVE....or in come cases underactive.

What a crock! my second child who actually got better care by virtue of being second has ADHD. He is the only one out of 3 children with it and I did nothing different with that pregnancy nor the raising of my children. I stayed home with all my children for the first 3 years of each childs life before going back to work. Go solve world hunger, cause your terrible at this.

[Quix]

THANKS TONS.

This is a favorite area of psychology, for me.

[4Godsoloved..Hegave]

The first two years are the most critical. Babies adopted at six months of age can already have attachment disorder, but it is much easier to "undo" at that age.

---

Known to me personally for 14 years now. By the grace of God alone, our 2nd daughter is now a bright and shining star. Brought home to us at 6mos. it took 7 years for her to truly bond and trust me. I am a mom who is the nurturing type as well as stubborn as all get out when it comes to raising up my babies to love and be loved.

I refuse to surrender such an important job as mothering my children to anyone else. We will all eat beans and rice 3 squares a day and go without a whole lot more before we make such a decision. I only wish folks would understand how very important this issue is to their families as well as our nation.

Like your screenname..Motherbear :-)

[4Godsoloved..Hegave]

SouthernFreebird,

I don't recall Motherbear saying that all cases of Hyperactivity in children is due to inadequate mother child bonding. If she did I will pipe in and say she is wrong. Because I likewise have a ADHD child that had the benefit of me all to herself 15 years ago.

The golden nugget in what she was saying is that it is essential and way more important than is being realized these days that our babies need consistent nurturing early and for as long as possible to ward off a host a problems that are enveloping our families. Doing the best we can do and know to do, will not erase all problems or potential problems our children might face.

Peace

[Katya]

I never "wanted" to stay home the first year of either of my childrens lives.....but I did.
I found it exhausting and lonely...but understood that if I thought it was difficult and I loved them, how could I possibly pay someone enough to want to do it well.

I also had the chance to see other peoples children at the park in the care of "high priced" nannies and cheap rate foreign au pairs... observing the poor care they often received enforced my belief that I had not sacrificed anything, having instead offered a priceless gift to my children.

[Liberty Wins]

I also had the chance to see other peoples children at the park in the care of "high priced" nannies and cheap rate foreign au pairs. . . observing the poor care they often received.

Katya, you are so correct in your observations and instincts. I always make a point of telling the parents of my preschool students, "Nobody will ever love your children as much as you do."

This is a simple truth. The parent has to be an advocate for their children because nobody else will, in the schools, daycares, hospitals, whatever.