Discovering My Sexuality (Joseph Farah joins Free Republic's retrosexual revolution!)

Worldnetdaily.com ^ | 04/20/04 | Joseph Farah

[goldstategop]

Discovering my sexuality

Joseph Farah

It seems everyone is discovering their sexuality these days.

You have homosexuals, bisexuals, lesbians, transsexuals, transgendereds, metrosexuals and more. I can't even keep up with the growing list of proclivities.

The notion of legalized same-sex marriages has prompted an increase in group unions. And, of course, there are even organized efforts to tear down the archaic laws against pedophilia.

In an age of seemingly no standards, I've discovered my own sexuality – albeit a bit late in life.

Count me among the retrosexuals.

What is a retrosexual?

For starters, I believe in paying for dinner. I believe in opening the door for my wife – or other ladies. I believe in giving up my seat on a bus or train for a woman. I believe in smoking cigars – even if it means sneaking them and puffing outside because wives and daughters frown upon the smell.

Retrosexual men never use more hair and skin products than a woman. My shaving needs consist of a disposable safety razor, the cheaper the better, a shaving brush and a bar of soap. The bar of soap comes in particularly handy because it can double as shampoo if my wife happens to be using something pink or expensive.

Retrosexuals don't have any confusion about who they are or what they are. They know that God made men and women different – they accept that as fact and appreciate the difference.

Retrosexuals don't think God makes mistakes. So, if women want to pretend they're men or men want to pretend they're women, they are not really fooling anyone but themselves.

You know what? I suspect there are a lot more retrosexuals out there than anyone knows.

The reason you don't read about retrosexuals in your daily newspaper or see them holding parades on television is because they are not news.

There's an old saying in the news business that "dog bites man" is not a story, but "man bites dog" is news.

Retrosexuals are not news because they are the majority. They are normal. They are what people expect.

But there is a sexual revolution under way in this country that seeks to marginalize the retrosexual. There is a sexual revolution under way in this country that seeks to overturn the old order of traditional morality, decency and chivalry. There is a sexual revolution under way in this country that seeks to ring in an era of anything-goes anarchy.

There are two ways to fight this revolution. We can fight defensively only – pointing out the ugly side of sexual anarchy. Or we can also fight offensively – championing the old order and making it appealing to a new generation.

Marriage was, is and always will be for members of the opposite sex. Some courts may say otherwise. Some legislatures may say otherwise. None of that will change anything because courts and legislatures didn't invent marriage – God did.

It's time to be counted. Maybe you didn't know you were a retrosexual until now. Maybe you didn't know you, too, were part of an alternative lifestyle. Maybe you didn't know you were part of a movement standing up for good, old-fashioned marriage between retrosexual men and women – and retrosexual men and women only.

That's because for too long this majority has been silent – listening to the cacophony of discontent and sexual-activist mayhem sweeping major cities, the courts and some legislatures.

Now you know who you are. It's time to stand up for your kids and their future. It's time to take back the institution of marriage. It's time for men to love their wives and for women to love their husbands. It's time girls started dreaming about marriage again. It's time for boys to respect girls again.

It's time for retrosexual revolution.

[goldstategop]

Joseph Farah has come out of the closet: He's joined Free Republic in saying "its time for retrosexual revolution." Hooyah! FR is on the cutting edge of societal evolution! :)

[cyborg]

YAHOOOOOOOO!

[AntiGuv]

Can I be a unisexual??

[cyborg]

Doesn't that get lonely? :D

[AntiGuv]

Well, maybe - but it's never hard to find a date!! :)

[sasportas]

Hear, hear. Bravo for Joseph Farah. It's about time somebody said it right.

[Ken H]

Stella Purdy (Stella Stevens) to Julius Kelp/Buddy Love (Jerry Lewis) in The Nutty Professor (1963):

'I always say that to love yourself is the beginning of a lifelong romance and after watching you I know that you and you will be very happy together.'

[SpyGuy]

The Left is on a mission to pervert and redefine everything in our culture: sexuality, marriage, religion, our Constitution, what's right, what's wrong, and even the very words of our language.

So what I want to know is, why do we need to follow their example? We don't need this new term -- "retrosexual" -- to describe normal, descent, mature adult behavior. The "old" language was fine, just as were the old morals and cultural values that guided our society.

Instead of falling into the Left's trap of "politically correct" thought and speech, I say it's high time we take back the English language!

[cyborg]

The good ole fashioned cowboy type manhood... or the just plain macho man who would kick someone's ass into the dirt to defend his family. He doesn't worry about creased pants and clean fingernails. I think retrosexual is a trendy thing in this day and age of pop culture and fads.

[BigSkyFreeper]

or the just plain macho man who would kick someone's ass into the dirt to defend his family. He doesn't worry about creased pants and clean fingernails. I think retrosexual is a trendy thing in this day and age of pop culture and fads.

Sadly, the Marlboro Man died decades ago. LOL

I get your point though. The Marlboro Man entered into my mind when I read your post. :)

I would rather be retrosexual than metrosexual, even though I am alot of both.

[SpyGuy]

I think retrosexual is a trendy thing in this day and age of pop culture and fads.

Screw trends. Give me tradition, normality, and societal stability any day.

[taxesareforever]

Ditto.

[BigSkyFreeper]

As I posted in #10, I'm alot of both, but I'll defend my right to being a normal, traditional, old fashioned kind of guy. Frankly, I think the idea of "coming out" as retrosexual just to conform with the metrosexuals is out and out stupid. Joseph Farah can get laughed out of buildings by proclaiming he's retrosexual for all I care. This is a same loon that built his place on the net solely on the Y2K "scare" that was not to be.

[Savage Beast]

"My shaving needs consist of a disposable safety razor, the cheaper the better, a shaving brush and a bar of soap."

Shaving cream's a nice invention, Joe. You don't have to get it all off, like you do soap; just wipe with a towel. Soap tends to chap the face; shaving cream tends to prevent that from happening. And...I don't think...that it will interfere with your retrosexuality.

[goldstategop]

I make do with a Norelco rechargeable Advantage electric razor. It can be used with shaving cream and running water and provides a smoother and closer shave than an ordinary razor without nicks and cuts. When the beard gets too thick, I trim it to the stubble line with a Norelco beard trimmer. And if you have to ask, despite the modern conveniences, yes, I am definitely a retrosexual.

[BigSkyFreeper]

You have homosexuals, bisexuals, lesbians, transsexuals, transgendereds, metrosexuals and more. I can't even keep up with the growing list of proclivities.

So in other words Joseph Farah is so confused and perplexed with all the different "subcultures", he goes out of his way to come up with a term just to fit into the complex mix somewhere? Cliquing oneself is so damn high school.

[goldstategop]

If you do't like "cliquing" there's a Scooby in you! ;-)

[lorrainer]

[GOPJ]

Any special privileges? Is it fair to fire a retrosexual? Can we have quotas?

It's time for retrosexual revolution.

[Savage Beast]

I didn't think otherwise. We don't have to concern ourselves with appearances--and we can take advantage of modern conveniences.