Jim Dobson had someone on FOCUS ON THE FAMILY in the last few months--I forget their names--noting that The Bible instructs MEN to LOVE their wives. Why no reciprocal? Because God CREATED WOMEN TO AUTOMATICALLY LOVE THEIR HUSBANDS AS NATURALLY AS BREATHING. But men have to focus on it, learn how, consciously persist in doing so; develop the habit of doing so.Given our horridly shattered society and absent to horrid parenting as the norm--most individuals of both sexes are learning much more about whining selfishly for perceived deficiencies in the goodies delivered rather than learning how to sow, cultivate, nurture the goodies they hope for--first, foremost, medium and last.
As has been said about happiness--chasing it doesn't work. Turning one's sights to being the quality person one can be . . . attending to the business of BEING LOVEABLE . . . happiness and love will come along and land in one's lap.
But with so many individuals having 18+ early years of training to be an excellent whiner, selfish, wimpy, sniveling, insecure, low-self-esteem, brutish, demanding pig . . . it tends to take a LOT of work and a LOT of time to move from that to being LOVEABLE.