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Disgruntled Asian Tattoo Artist Inks His Revenge
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Posted on 08/08/2003 1:08:32 PM PDT by Feiny

Pitt junior Brandon Smith wanted a tattoo that proclaimed his manliness, so he decided to get the Chinese characters for “strength” and “honor” on his chest. After 20 minutes under the needle of local tattoo artist Andy Sakai, he emerged with the symbol for “small penis” embedded in his flesh.

“I had it for months before I knew what it really meant,” Smith said.

“Then I went jogging through the Carnegie Mellon campus and a group of Asian kids started laughing and calling me ‘Shorty.’ That’s when I knew something was up.”

Sakai, an award-winning tattoo artist, was tired of seeing sacred Japanese words, symbols of his heritage, inked on random white people. So he used their blissful ignorance to make an everlasting statement. Any time acustomer came to Sakai’s home studio wanting Japanese tattooed on them, he modified it into a profane word or phrase.

“All these preppy sorority girls and suburban rich boys think they’re so cool ‘cause they have a tattoo with Japanese characters. But it doesn’t mean shit to them!” Sakai said. “The dumbasses don’t even realize that I’ve written ‘slut’ or ‘pervert’ on their skin!”

In the last month, seven people unknowingly received explicit tattoos from the disgruntled artist. Kerri Baker, a Carlow College freshman, paid $50 to have the symbols for “beautiful goddess” etched above her belly button, but when she went into Szechuan Express Asian Noodle Shop sporting a bare midriff, the giggling employees explained to her that the tattoo really said, “Insert General Tso’s Chicken Here!”

“I don’t even like General Tso’s!” Baker sobbed. “I’m a vegetarian!”

Sakai doesn’t feel guilty about using hapless college students as canvases for his graffiti.

“I think I’m helping my fellow man by labeling all the stupid people in the world,” he explained. “It’s not a crime, it’s a public service.”


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dumbcollegekids; hilarious; pittsburgh; revenge; tattoos
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Above: Symbols on the back of a Pitt student inked by Sakai (inset) were originally meant to say “princess.” They really say “prostitute.”

1 posted on 08/08/2003 1:08:32 PM PDT by Feiny
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To: dead; AnnaZ; diotima; HangFire
I know you love a funny story.
2 posted on 08/08/2003 1:09:33 PM PDT by Feiny (Life is too short to drink bad wine.)
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To: feinswinesuksass
It's funny, but I also suspect that its made up.
3 posted on 08/08/2003 1:16:47 PM PDT by dead (Perdicaris alive or Raisuli dead!)
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To: dead
I checked snopes.com as I suspected the same thing, but it wasn't listed.
4 posted on 08/08/2003 1:21:10 PM PDT by Feiny (Life is too short to drink bad wine.)
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To: dead
I sent it to my friend who is a tattoo artist.

He once put secret vaginas on every single feather he did on the back of a real pain-in-the-butt client who tried to rip him off by never paying for the work.
5 posted on 08/08/2003 1:25:09 PM PDT by Feiny (Life is too short to drink bad wine.)
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To: feinswinesuksass
It’s sort of covered here:

Prostitution Medallion

It’s still very funny though.

6 posted on 08/08/2003 1:36:31 PM PDT by dead (Perdicaris alive or Raisuli dead!)
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To: feinswinesuksass
The katakana in this pic actually mean "Yellow Cab". Katakana is mostly used to write foreign words in Japanese syllabary.

"Yellow Cab" in Japan is an unkind euphemism for a Japanese woman who sleeps around with lots of white guys (not necessarily for money.)

Definitely fightin words.

Of course, anyone stupid enough to get a tattoo he or she cannot read personally deserves whatever grief the tattoo causes them.
7 posted on 08/08/2003 1:39:10 PM PDT by Ronin (Qui tacet consentit!)
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To: feinswinesuksass
“I think I’m helping my fellow man by labeling all the stupid people in the world,” he explained. “It’s not a crime, it’s a public service.”

So let me get this straight. He considers himself a tattoo "artist" and sees nothing wrong with his calling. So getting a tattoo is not why they are "stupid". No, they're "stupid" because they don't know how to read Japanese. Of course, if a Japanese person wants Japanese characters tattoed, that's different, right?

This guy is just a typical garden variety racist. He, by his own words, just does this to "white people".

8 posted on 08/08/2003 2:33:09 PM PDT by dark_lord (The Statue of Liberty now holds a baseball bat and she's yelling 'You want a piece of me?')
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To: feinswinesuksass
: )

Cooooool!
9 posted on 08/08/2003 2:44:05 PM PDT by El Sordo
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To: dark_lord
I agree with you.

I also don't trust anyone in the world enough to let them put permanent marks on me just for vanity's sake, even if it wasn't against my religious beliefs.

Besides, I don't think there's anything I would be sure I wouldn't get tired of, or that would look good wrinkled....
10 posted on 08/08/2003 2:47:20 PM PDT by ChemistCat (Oklahoma City--Where 56% of HS Seniors Get No Diploma, And No One Knows Why Not.)
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To: feinswinesuksass
Every once in awhile, the english-speakers exact their revenge:

Then there was the similar tattoo story out of China.

11 posted on 08/08/2003 3:14:09 PM PDT by martin_fierro (A v v n c v l v s M a x i m v s)
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To: dark_lord
If they are stupid enough to get a word tattooed on their body that they don't know....they get what they deserve. They are college kids....they could do a little research first.
12 posted on 08/08/2003 3:14:29 PM PDT by Feiny (Life is too short to drink bad wine.)
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To: *Pittsburgh; Willie Green; 3catsanadog; agrace; annyokie; Atlantin; Badray; Benrand; ...
It's a 'Burgh


Thing.TM

Send FReepmail if you want on/off BPT list
Learn Pittsburghese!

13 posted on 08/08/2003 3:16:03 PM PDT by martin_fierro (A v v n c v l v s M a x i m v s)
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To: martin_fierro; AnnaZ
AnnaZ LOVES Engrish.com

14 posted on 08/08/2003 3:17:46 PM PDT by Feiny (Life is too short to drink bad wine.)
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To: martin_fierro
what a jagoff. hey, do you have jagoff tattooed on you somewehre?
15 posted on 08/08/2003 3:21:32 PM PDT by xsmommy
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To: xsmommy
hey, do you have jagoff tattooed on you somewehre?

Please. I exude Jagoff.

16 posted on 08/08/2003 3:25:56 PM PDT by martin_fierro (A v v n c v l v s M a x i m v s)
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To: feinswinesuksass
Anyone dumb enough to have someone who is not eminently trustworthy making permanent marks on their flesh in a language they don't understand deserves what they get.
17 posted on 08/08/2003 4:27:24 PM PDT by thoughtomator (Objects in post may be more clever than they first appear)
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To: feinswinesuksass
AnnaZ LOVES Engrish.com
 
'Tis true.
 
More revenge...
 
 

18 posted on 08/08/2003 6:36:23 PM PDT by AnnaZ (unspunwithannaz.blogspot.com... "It is UNSPUN and it is Unspun, but it is not unspun." -- unspun)
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To: martin_fierro
Thanks for posting the picture! Engrish.com is one of those websites you must never view at the office - it's laugh-out-loud, really LOUD, funny (same with lileks.com's gallery of regrettable food).
19 posted on 08/08/2003 7:54:32 PM PDT by Moonmad27
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To: Ronin
Of course, anyone stupid enough to get a tattoo he or she cannot read personally deserves whatever grief the tattoo causes them.

When I was in college, a female foreign student had a jacket from a cat house in Nevada; the jacket featured the name of a cat house, a caption like "The best cat house in Nevada", and a picture of a cat. I asked her discretely if she knew what a cat house was. Since she did not, I suggested she should find out. I never again saw her wearing that jacket.

20 posted on 08/08/2003 8:19:36 PM PDT by supercat (TAG--you're it!)
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