No, you are absolutely right, he cannot quit. I had a bit of a situation like that with my oldest daughter when she made drum major her sophomore year of high school. Halfway through football season she was ready to leave a football game and walk out on the band. I hated her being in band because I hated all the back and forth driving and being at all the stuff. BUT! That was not the time to have my no-band wish come true!!!
She completed that year and then quit band for good. Kind of sorry about that but still had to teach her to finish her committment to the other people.
That's always been our policy. The only time we've ever let him quit was a couple of summers ago, he quit after one swim team practice. But that was when he was still having ear trouble and he woke up at 3:00 a.m. with excruciating ear pain. He said "I don't want to be on swim team" and we agreed.
I know this is frustrating for him. The youth production is very important, and very intense. In fact the intensity of our productions is why I'm considering not doing the Christmas show this year (and why I'm currently not singing in the choir).
I think he probably resents that the game hinges on his willingness to play. And while I don't blame him, we can't change that either.