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Black Bears Demand To Be Referred To As 'Bears Of Color'
BabylonBee.com ^ | Oct 21, 2025 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 10/21/2025 3:19:22 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum

SACRAMENTO, CA — In a historic move, California's famous black bears, in cooperation with the NAACP, met on the steps of the state capitol to demand that they now be referred to as "Bears of Color."

"For too long our people have suffered with this outdated and harmful epitaph," a spokesbear told reporters gathered at a press conference. "This is not the name we chose for ourselves. We demand to be called Bears of Color from now on."

Gathered members of the press looked on in confusion as a coalition of bears took turns at the microphone, explaining their new position.

"We will not be called by YOUR words for us," another bear said. "We come from a vast, diverse heritage, and we need a name that reflects that history. Call us Bears of Color, or we'll eat you. You decide."

Reporters admitted that they had a hard time understanding the noises coming out of the bear's mouth, as none of them spoke bear, but they thought they understood the gist of the announcement.

"A lot of arm waving, lots of growling, but I think I got the main idea," reporter Sam Sanders said. "I don't really know why any of it matters, but they seemed really fired up about it, so I guess we'll make sure to call them Bears of Color from here on out. That might get a little confusing when reporting bear attacks, though."

At publishing time, the bears announced that they were launching a campaign for media depictions of bears to include more bears of color.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; keywordkaren; keywordtroll; satire; spammingfr
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1 posted on 10/21/2025 3:19:22 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

How about grizzlies? Will they be now called Bears of Grizzle?


2 posted on 10/21/2025 3:22:48 PM PDT by Verginius Rufus
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To: Verginius Rufus
How about grizzlies? Will they be now called Bears of Grizzle?

Not to mention Bears of Polar!

3 posted on 10/21/2025 3:24:55 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Je suis Charlie Kirk.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

4 posted on 10/21/2025 3:25:20 PM PDT by Diana in Wisconsin (I don't have, 'Hobbies.' I'm developing a robust Post-Apocalyptic skill set.)
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To: Verginius Rufus

Polar bears will be left out.
Brown Bears are also Bears of Color.


5 posted on 10/21/2025 3:27:48 PM PDT by scrabblehack
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Not African-American bears?


6 posted on 10/21/2025 3:36:22 PM PDT by CodeToad
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Black Bear Lives Matter.


7 posted on 10/21/2025 3:37:04 PM PDT by mass55th (“Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” ― John Wayne)
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To: Verginius Rufus

I think a big old rough, tough ‘’grizzer’’ bear should be called what ever it prefers.

Last night the cat told the wife and I she didn’t want to be called a cat anymore.

Said from now on she wanted to be known as a “Feline American’’.


8 posted on 10/21/2025 3:37:31 PM PDT by jmacusa ( Liberals. Too stupid to be idiots.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Dindoo Nuffin bears...


9 posted on 10/21/2025 3:39:05 PM PDT by Adder (End fascism...defeat all Democrats.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

What the heck to we call a panda? They are black and white.


10 posted on 10/21/2025 3:42:04 PM PDT by sevinufnine
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To: sevinufnine
What the heck to we call a panda? They are black and white.

Bear of Monochrome?

11 posted on 10/21/2025 3:46:25 PM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (Je suis Charlie Kirk.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Ran into one on the Ouchita. East side. Really. Just a pain in the ass. We cannot shoot them.They can fnxk up some things.

They a t e nto some ETX.


12 posted on 10/21/2025 4:04:06 PM PDT by waterhill (Nobody cares, work harder!)
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To: mass55th

The Pooh Bear is the moat superior Bear.


13 posted on 10/21/2025 4:08:25 PM PDT by cowboyusa ( YESHUA IS KING OF AMERICA AND HE WILL HAVE NO OTHER GODS BEFORE HIM!)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum
"Not to mention Bears of Polar!"


They don't matter... In fact, they've enjoyed polar privilege for so many years now that we should shun them at every turn. It's ridiculous that they can't even see the amount of privilege they enjoy...

14 posted on 10/21/2025 4:09:32 PM PDT by Raven6 (Psalm 144:1 and Proverbs 22:3)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Will it be a petition just for polar bears or for all wild animals in general?


15 posted on 10/21/2025 4:12:48 PM PDT by californian by choice (Who are those who believe in science?)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

I’m sorry, but the bears failed to give a land acknowledgement, so I don’t feel sorry for them. I’m sure they colonized some other bear of color’s salmon stream.


16 posted on 10/21/2025 4:15:27 PM PDT by wrcase
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Watch out for bipolar bears. Unpredictable. Manic, they can be lots of fun, but depressive? Run for the igloo, or whatever they have in Antarctica.


17 posted on 10/21/2025 4:17:19 PM PDT by farm_kid (Seize a carp a day (carpe per diem))
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To: wrcase
About time.

BCBiPOC

18 posted on 10/21/2025 4:21:30 PM PDT by Robwin ( )
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

it matters. watch now as they are given preferential college admissions, financial aid galore, and degrees without meaning.
also if you were thinking of applying for any employment and aren’t a Bear of Colour.....forget it!

/s


19 posted on 10/21/2025 4:24:15 PM PDT by faithhopecharity ("Politicians aren't born, they're excreted." Marcus Tullius Cicero (106 to 43 BCE))
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

“Is it them again, Yogi?”
“No, it’s US, Booboo.”


20 posted on 10/21/2025 4:43:48 PM PDT by LittleBillyInfidel (This tagline has been formatted to fit the screen. Some content has been edited.)
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