Posted on 05/09/2021 1:23:45 PM PDT by tbw2
PORTLAND, OR—According to sources close to the Larson household, Steve, the family's non-menstruating partner, wished Carrie, the family's menstruating partner, an early happy birthing person's day this evening.
"Greetings, menstruating partner, and may you have a satisfactory birthing person's day this year!" Larson said as he gave her a gift of roses and chocolate, traditional presents for the ovary-possessing partner in a relationship. "May you bear many more offspring of indeterminate gender, as is your primary function in this relationship between two or more homo sapiens!"
"Also, I am feeling emotions of fondness, but they are simply random chemical reactions in my brain approximating the abstract and imaginary concept of 'love,' honey!" he added romantically. He then rubbed her shoulders for several moments before his hands got tired.
The non-menstruator was puzzled, however, when his technically accurate and non-offensive terminology failed to woo his menstruating partner and she went to bed without returning his affections in a romantic manner.
Larson also said he is hoping to receive a new set of golf clubs for non-birthing person's day coming up in June.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
How is this satire?
;)
I prefer gateway.
I don’t get it. Is Steve past menopause? 😃
Happy initialization day!
Steve should check his non-menstruating privilege.
This menstruating inequality is totally unacceptable.
Menstruating lives matter.
Defund the pad companies!!
Happy decanting day!
“Men”struating? How about “personstruating”?
Eleven separate illegal use of gendered pronouns in one little article. How does the author choose to be executed?
Shhhh....
Don’t give these psychos any ideas.
Ridicule, mocking, parody, satire are good ways to beat back the Communists and their sinister attempts to control language and thought. Tell the worthless bastards to go to hell...every day!
Becoming reality real soon.
Or Mxnstruating.
Birthing PERSON is so species-ist.
I prefer Birthing Unit.
I think it should be womenstrating.
The term ‘MFer’ (as in ‘you rotten MFer’) must be replaced immediately with ‘MPFer’.
And the old punchline, “Mama, mama, baby brother just said half a word: ‘mutha’” will lose all meaning.
Love it!
Which one is which?
womynstrating
Can’t you fake ‘menstruate’ with KoolAid and identify it as menstruating?
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