Well, Harvard did invite Al Franken (a Harvard grad) to give the 2002 Class Day address.
Included in his oration: I want to take this moment to congratulate today's Ivy Orators, Taii Bullock and Jeremy Bronson, on your very funny remarks. You're terrific. Where are you? Taii? (APPLAUSE) I was, ironically, the Ivy Orator twenty-nine years ago. And I'm afraid I used the "f" word quite a few times in my speech. It was 1973. And a couple weeks later I received a note through the class marshal's office from an outraged parent, saying, "We came to watch you graduate from college, not from kindergarten." I've always felt kinda bad about that, and I was hoping to be invited back so that I could apologize.
Sic transit Harvard.
They’re trying to sound educated. One of my cousins works in a university faculty office. The deans write incomprehensible gibberish which she then translates into real words. When they argue with her, she has to explain that the purpose of that particular writing is to clearly convey information to other people. When it isn’t understandable, those people totally screw up what they are being asked to do (which she has to fix).