Looking at pans of soul food: "Gawd, this will give me such indigestion! And what is this green stuff? I can't get back to the hotel for a Pepto and filet mignon fast enough!"
Of the person who dared to get close to him: "Oh drat, he's touching me! What the f*** does he think he's doing? Doesn't he know who I am?"
Looking at basketball: "I say, my good man, what exactly is this spherical object and what, pray tell, does one do with it? You know, it reminds me of the giant lethal bullets fired at me in Vietnam, but I don't suppose you people know anything about Vietnam."
Amazing.
Egads, I wonder where this has been?
My butler better have my disinfecting wet-naps at the ready on the bus!
Why does eff'n where a tie to get soul food? I've never seen anything like this guy. He couldn't be normal to save his life. What a major league geek.