ROFLOL
Posted on 09/03/2026 7:57:10 PM PDT by Impala64ssa
JUPITER, FL — A Florida court suspended golf legend Tiger Woods' driver's license for five years after an investigation determined that he is half-Asian.
County Court Judge Darren Steele issued the ruling after prosecutors presented overwhelming evidence that Woods, despite his physical appearance, is part Thai and Chinese.
"For the safety of the public, we cannot allow a half-Asian back on the road," said Judge Steele to Woods. "If you were just a quarter-Asian, perhaps we could work out a deal. But 50 percent is way too much. I hereby immediately suspend your driving privileges and order you to have a driver — of a non-Asian variety — to always chauffeur you to your destination."
Woods appeared dejected, but did not attempt to protest the ruling. "I deeply apologize to my family, friends, and all my fans for callously choosing to drive despite being part-Asian," said Woods in a statement. "The facts are the facts. I knew what I was doing was unsafe, yet I chose to do it anyway. I accept the court's ruling and look forward to moving on with my life."
Dear FRiends,
We need your continuing support to keep FR funded. Your donations are our sole source of funding. No sugar daddies, no advertisers, no paid memberships, no commercial sales, no gimmicks, no tax subsidies. No spam, no pop-ups, no ad trackers.
If you enjoy using FR and agree it's a worthwhile endeavor, please consider making a contribution today:
Click here: to donate by Credit Card
Or here: to donate by PayPal
Or by mail to: Free Republic, LLC - PO Box 9771 - Fresno, CA 93794
Thank you very much and God bless you,
Jim
OMG, that is a RIOT! LOL Bees.
ROFLOL
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.