Pandemic Crisis Excess Profits Tax [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 20 Dec 2020 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

Hawaii Democrat Rep. Tulsi Gabbard has submitted legislation (HR 1267) that would force corporations such as Amazon, Facebook, Walmart, and Google that have seen their profits soar during the pandemic pay a tax that would fund aid to their small business competitors that were economically harmed by government lockdown orders.

Since the start of the pandemic an estimated 50% of the nation’s small businesses have been forced to close. Meanwhile, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos has increased his wealth by more than $70 billion and Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has increased his by more than $25 billion. Big box retailers like Walmart, Target, Home Depot, and Wayfair have also seen their profits surge as their competitors are run out of business.

“Big tech corporations and big-box retailers are among those who have made excessive profits during the COVID-19 pandemic, while mom and pop shops are being forced to close their doors due to government-mandated restrictions,” Gabbard said. “Declaring these large corporations ‘essential’ while simultaneously shutting down small businesses as governors across the nation have done is fundamentally unfair.”

Multi-billionaire Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg immediately denounced Gabbard’s proposal, calling it “false and misleading” and vowed to “block the accounts of any Facebook members who attempt to repeat her lies or ‘likes’ her proposal or makes any favorable mention of it. We at Facebook take our position as the guardian of truth very seriously. No one, not even a sitting congresswoman, can escape our scrutiny or our retaliation for egregious violation of our standards or our terms of service.”

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