[marajade]

"I hadn't seen that wealth was a guarantee put forth in the example."

We're talking about an age span of what 15 years. When I was 25 and single, marrying a 38 year old man was the last man I'd consider dating. Honestly, I'd be afraid he wouldn't be able to keep up or even know how to have lots of fun.

I was really only joking about the $$$ stuff.

[linda_22003]

I always dated older men back at the time I was that age. Now, if I got back into the dating scene (heaven forbid), I'd have to go younger, since most men older than I am are dead. ;-D

[HairOfTheDog]

When I was 25 and single, marrying a 38 year old man was the last man I'd consider dating.

Agreed. And it came up once, and went over like a lead balloon.

[HitmanLV]

Everyone has different tastes, and everybody gets what they deserve. While a lot has changed, a 38 year old man and a mid-20s woman dating is still more common than a mid 20s man dating a 38 year old woman.

Most of the men I know my age, who aren't married, are dating women about 10 years younger than they are. We can't all be anomalies: at least some women are buying what we are selling (and it's not like we are terribly rich, either).

On the other hand, most of the single women I know in their mid 30s or so would certainly date a man in his mid 20s. their problem is broader in scope: they can't get men interested, whether he is 25 or 35. They aren't bad looking women, and they aren't bad women. At middle age, they are just finding it difficult to find a quality man, and keep him interested.

[tortoise]

When I was 25 and single, marrying a 38 year old man was the last man I'd consider dating.

This is very much a cultural issue. In most cultures for most of history, marrying the older male was generally considered a good thing for a number of reasons. I know a number of eligible females of many different backgrounds that essentially refuse to date any man that is not at least five years their senior. Everyone rationalizes what they find attractive from a kind of twisted subconscious cost/benefit analysis. It may seem odd, but it does actually make some sense. A more extreme example of this is that I've known one or two women who desired arranged marriages and got them, as was a custom of their culture, and they had been living comfortably independent in the US for many, many years and with no practical restrictions on who they could marry.

I will add that for young women, older men arguably come with some considerable advantages that most men their age do not posess. On average, they are more mature, make fewer relationship mistakes, and often financially capable of supporting a family well. And the hormones that lead them to do stupid and destructive things have been reduced to a dull roar. If the guy is actually charming and not a complete toad, the package sells far better than you might think.

But this depends a great deal on what you are after. If the woman is interested in building a solid family above all else, the older man is nearly ideal. If you the woman is interested in a life companion, a man closer to her own age may be more attractive. It is a distinction with a real difference, and the perspective is often biased by the culture it is formed in. Significant age differentials were never uncommon in the US in the past.