Posted on 06/13/2004 2:06:07 PM PDT by JPhill9123
Free Parking is For Monopoly Boards, Not Pregnant Women
May 5, 2004
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- by John Phillips
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fearing that the state of California isn’t dishing out enough special perks at Wal Mart for those who forget to use condoms, one state assemblyman is proposing a bill that would allow pregnant women to park in spots designated for those with physical handicaps. Pregnant women across America are hailing the event as the biggest win for expecting mothers since NBA superstar and seven-time illegitimate father Shawn Kemp agreed to pay child support.
Republican Assemblyman Tony Strickland said he was sparked to introduce the legislation after hearing complaints from angry constituents who – gasp – couldn’t find parking next to the front door at Macy’s. He tells the L.A. Daily News, “a lot of them [pregnant women] gave me stories about how they didn’t go to the mall or supermarket because they couldn’t walk all the way from a normal parking spot.”
While it’s understandable that nine months of pregnancy would teach some women the virtues of keeping their legs together – walking an extra four spaces in the parking lot isn’t exactly the ‘trail of tears.’ Even for pregnant women.
Handicapped spaces aren’t meant to be some sort of ‘employee of the month’ perk for whatever group whines the loudest in Sacramento. If so, the prison guards’ union would have had it in their contract long ago. These spaces are meant for people with serious physical disabilities. Pregnant women are literally demanding that triple amputees and paraplegics stop being so damn greedy!
Without getting too biological, these are apples and oranges. You choose to get pregnant. You don’t choose to have cancer. With the possible exception of Ethel Kennedy – no woman has ever been born pregnant.
In addition, it is highly possible for those with physical handicaps to be single and childless. Paranoid Vietnam vets with missing limbs who sport pirate eye-patches and suffer from dementia aren’t exactly known for cleaning up in the singles bars.
Since asexual reproduction is still just an apple in Murphy Brown’s eye, pregnant women incapable of walking long distances should expect their ‘baby daddy’ to do the shopping. These men should just think of it as their second official automobile related contribution to the pregnancy – just the first one occurring from the front seat.
However, I don’t expect the ‘married with children’ types to back down from this absurd request. They are emboldened by the fact that they always get what they want and have no problem asking the general public to do more sacrificing than an Aztec at a nun convent.
They are also impervious to logic, debate and compromise. If single and childless people ever dare to oppose any of their idiotic, self-serving programs they are branded as being ‘against the children.’
If you don’t want your property taxes raised for the umpteenth time to pay for another school bond…you are ‘against the children.’ If you think that rated R movies are peachy for network television…you are ‘against the children.’ If you think ‘per child’ tax credits are unfair and discriminatory…you are, all together now, ‘against the children.’ You get the picture.
To these people, if you don’t blindly and completely go along with their agenda you are doing the political equivalent of sending America’s children over to Neverland Ranch for a sleepover. Leaders of mind-altering cults would kill for this kind of orthodoxy.
Enough is enough!
The single, childless people aren’t the greedy ones – we pay astronomical taxes (at higher rates) for services we largely don’t use. And then, as a parting gift, we get lectured for not forking over more of our income!
The true leeches in our society are those that have children they can’t afford – and then demand that the rest of us pick up their tab.
Their entire life is one big game of the ‘Price is Right.’ Every time they have another kid they get another plinko chip. ‘Here comes baby Junior, have another plinko chip! There it goes…clink, clink, clink, clink, clink, clink, clink…Nameless replacement for Rod, tell them what they won!’ ‘Well, Bob….Mike and Judy are now the proud owners of a shiny new handicapped parking permit! Now you can cruise the mall in style, acing out any mutilated burn victim for the privilege of parking your brand new car in a prime time spot!’
It’s time to stop this madness.
Instead of spending millions of dollars on ‘No Child Left Behind,” how about instituting a policy of ‘Every Child Left Behind” at movie theatres, restaurants and on airplanes? What about dropping the “credit” part of the $500 per child tax credit? Or replacing ‘Spin City’ with ‘Sex and the City’ on network television? How do you like them apples?
It’s not so much fun when the shoe is on the other foot – or in the case of the handicapped parking spots, if the wheelchair is under the other derriere.
Those in our society who are married with children need to accept the fact that they have a pretty damn good deal. Most childless people don’t complain when the breeders get another tax credit, pass another school bond or go completely insane when Justin Timberlake checks up on Janet Jackson’s mammarian health.
But taking parking spots away from those who truly need them is a new low. Even worse than being ‘against the children.’
John Phillips
DISCUSS THIS IN THE FORUM!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- John Phillips is a freelance writer and operates the website www.johnphillipsworld.com
My OB and her partner both had different due dates for me - July 8th and July 13th. I had my normal Monday appointment on June 29 and my OB (7/13) said to me, I'd like to wish you a happy July 4th, but I'm going to see you sooner than that. She was right. My daughter was born the afternoon of July 2!!!!
I was thrilled - it was so HOT that spring - I had been miserable for months. And like you - I'm very lucky to married married to one of the men that tries as best he can to understand......though I do remember one night him practically begging me to please just tell him out right what it was I wanted or needed - he couldn't understand my hints and couldn't read my mind....LOL
(Let the misogynist cringe with this talk)
I hope MOST businesses will chafe at something like this...........unfortunately it is California......and I've come to expect most businesses just roll over and play dead when it comes to issues of government mandates on how they attract or retain or market to their chosen clientele. Think about it.......a men's clothing store required to have "pregnant parking?" How ridiculous is that?
I'm inclined to agree with you about the parking revenue scheme. I blew up like a ballon when pregnant, but I know many woman that didn't look like they were pregnant until practically the last minute.........so proving is another nightmare of this entire nightmare issue.
As I said earlier, as far as I know I haven't met anyone like this..........heck even my friends who are homosexual have no use for misogynists.
I know we all dislike government meddling... but IMO any man who doesn't go out of his way to assist a pregnant woman isn't worth a bucket of spit.
Please - reread what the females on this thread are saying - we are against this...............
I've personally met a few misogynists.
Here's the weird part: they liked male/female sexual relations just fine, they just hated women for some reason known only to them.
(Maybe it's some Freudian mental wackiness?)
That'd be worth a humor photo, a maternity parking sign in front of a men's clothing store.
Please reread what the ladies are saying.
Or better yet - a Strip Club!!!!!!!!!!
I apologize for not reading your post more carefully.
!!!!
LOL!
My uber-liberal fancy pants neighbors would find that horribly offensive, but if they're going to FORCE businesses to put up the signs.. why not have one in front of a Strip Club?
[OMG this is horrible]
Oddly, with that sign placement mentioned, the stupid sign enforcement idea sounds like it may be worth seeing just to prove what a dumb idea it is.
LOL!!!!!!!!!!
I wish I was savvy enough with the photo shop ptype stuff to come up with something like that - it would be a screaming riot!!!!!!!!
And then send it to this STUPID Kookiefornie legislator!!!
Registered can do the photoshop stuff.
Don't know if he'd take it as a request, but someone can ask him.
Kalifornistan.. gotta 'love' the legislative ideas they get.
(reminds me of NY at times, only worse.)
OH, I'm sorry if I implied that I was for expectant mom parking, it was part of another conversation teasing the type of guy that would post this.
I would never condone the use of Handicap parking for those other than the disabled, there are few enough spaces as is, and the more walking the later in pregnancy the better, because it is *suppose* to help bring on labor.
:)
That was a happy thought. I noticed though a lot of older guys are always there with a nice comment and a helping hand, but yesterday at the mall I was almost run over by a group of 20 somethings trying to get to the movies in a hurry without an "excuse me"....
You guys are naughty....
oh, and expecting mother parking at strip clubs would be in the rear, reserved for the dancers...
Right along side the smoking section..............
But to stay on subject, in the parking lot where I go to the Market and Post Office a few years back they posted a few signs on some of the parking spaces.
They said "Parking provided by Codding Industries for Mothers with Infants or Toddlers."
Well, even though I am not a "Mother", I parked there with my toddlers anyway.
A few months later they changed the sign to say "Parents" instead of "Mothers"
Now that was nice.
At that time I always had a car seat in my vehicle, so I would park in that space if it was available.
If anyone questioned me when I didn't have a kid with me, I would say "Oh my goodness, I left my toddler in the store!"
LOL
Actually I am kidding, but I did use the parking spaces whenever they were available. At that time I had a hip and knee medical problem as well as a hernia, and it helped to not have to walk so far to the store.
Eventually they took down the signs, and only the Handicapped spaces are there now.
It's one thing to make the argument that it's silly for the government to require special spaces for pregnant women; it's quite another to call them "breeders" and suggest that they have kept their legs together.
Hey, I have an even BETTER idea. Almost everywhere I drive, I have a dog in my car. How about reserving the shady parking spaces for "dogs only"?
Just an idea..........
~</;o)
LOL!
You two!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.