My father in law died 3 months ago. And right after that my mother was diagnosed with esophageal (sp) cancer. They operated, took out her esophagus and took her stomach and made a new esophagus. She's doing pretty well.......but has lost over 50 pounds because food goes right "through". She HAS to go see a nutritionist SOON or she will lose too much weight. I am trying not to panic.
This has been a lousy year for our family with sickness and death. Praise the Lord for the surgeons, doctors, nurses and HOSPICE that have helped our whole family through.
Hospice, for my father in law and my uncle were so wonderful. I can't put into words how caring and helpful they were. And just "how" they died doesn't concern me....they were in pain and suffering and HOSPICE came in put them OUT OF PAIN.
Sorry for the rant....this is "raw" to me right now. I would never want to be a Terri Shiavo. I can understand parents not wanting to let go of their baby. But after my experience, seeing the downhill battle..the loss of all cognisance, ...the spirit gone.... it's time to let go. And as Christians, that shouldn't be such a scary proposition.
Be well friend.
I am so sorry for your losses and what you are going through right now...I had to deal with my mom with Alzheimers, and my dad with cancer...tho it was a few years back...for you, things are still very close to the surface, and as you say, 'raw'...I completely understand...
This happens to most of us...there comes a time, when our parents are very aged, or very ill, and end of life issues become so very important...and their end of life care is so very important...and we have the privilege of caring for them, as they cared for us when we were babies and children...but its difficult, because we realize that what we are doing for our parents is end of life care, as opposed to the beginning of life care they gave us...
I hope you will take care of yourself, thats important, if you plan to help care for your mom...I took care of both of my parents at home, until they died, but was lucky enough to have money enough to hire nurses and aides to care for them a few hours a day, so that I could take care of myself, and my family...Your care for yourself is super important...
I will think of you this evening, and think of your mom...will say a prayer for you...should you ever just want to chat, Freepmail me...I have cared for my mom with Alzheimers while she was dying, I cared for my dad with cancer while he was dying, and I also cared for my older son, with leukemia, while he was dying...I have some small insight into the toll this can take on a person..sometimes just having another person to use a sounding board, can help...I would be pleased to help you in any way I can...take care...
Be well also, friend...