I am grateful too, and even more so for your cat. You did what any owner needs to be prepared to do, but not many of us could find your strength in that kind of situation.
I cannot even imagine how horrible that must have been for you. If that had happened to my cat Sasha, I don't know that I would have been able to have done the right thing. More than likely all I would have been able to do is panic, waste time and cause her needless suffering. I know this doesn't help you at this painful time, but you did the kindest and most humane thing you could do. I know that your cat would be grateful for helping him end his suffering as quickly as you did.
training.
I was trained pretty much from birth to shoulder the load, without hesitation or shirk, when push comes to shove. giving mercy is just part of that.
the hurt, like the fear and the regret, comes after.
it ALWAYS comes after.