Similar problem here. I'm trying to decide whether I've simply dreamed up a fantasy that I want him to be, based on what little time I've had with him personally, or if we ever were to spend any time together would I discover that things were best left as a an unsolved mystery.
But alas, we may never find out, since he has a girlfriend of several years, and is in an on-again-off-again relationship, and apparently it's more ON than OFF, as was the case when we met (which must have been during an OFF period).
In some ways I guess the not knowing (if the relationship would work) is probably harder than know that it would. My guy and I are best friends and have been for almost five years. In the beginning it was a physical relationship. After a year of that we had a fight about commitment and from then on it’s just very, very close friends. Sometimes I think the only answer is to end the friendship.