Posted on 07/20/2023 3:39:53 PM PDT by DFG
U.S. — In an attempt to avoid further injury and traumatic incidents involving Caucasians eating food that's far too spicy for them, the scientists behind the Scoville Scale have announced they are releasing a separate spiciness scale for white people.
"We had to do something to save all those white folks," said Dr. Glenn Jacobs, lead researcher on the Scoville team. "We've been inundated with reports of white people suffering severe injuries while attempting to impress other people by ingesting foods that rank near the top of the scale. This new scale will likely save countless lives."
The Scoville Scale, originally developed in 1912 by a pharmacist searching for a heat-producing ointment, measures the intensity of heat in different foods, such as peppers and hot sauces. The scale has gone through numerous updates over the years as new breeds of peppers and spicier foods have been created. "It became clear that a new whites-specific scale was necessary," said Dr. Jacobs. "While a very minute percentage of Caucasians can tolerate truly spicy food, we found a startling number of white people who think Heinz ketchup is too spicy. Something needed to be done to address this."
The new Scoville Scale for White Folks (which is its official title), features a heat scale that begins with mayonnaise and works its way up to the (according to many whites) blistering heat of Taco Bell's "mild" sauce.
At publishing time, obstacles in the rollout of the new scale were already arising, as several Caucasian test subjects were left red-faced and sweating after eating a single Cool Ranch Dorito.
It’s LOL, but I take exception to being grouped with brain damaged re-TARDS.
I use cayenne like ground pepper and am angry that fresh peppers this year seem to be lacking iron heat for some damned reason (Serranos in particular)
Funny 😆
Drought in Mexico, 2022
I worked with a guy that must have been addicted to hot peppers. He would eat dried cayenne peppers like potato chips. I saw him go through an entire bottle of Dave’s Insanity Sauce in about a week and a half by dipping in a popsicle stick and licking it off.
What is extra funny is the its the same process when you read a “real news” ...and you think this is insane ...it can’t be true..the difference of course, is the bee is satire..and not real...it’s not real,right?
What is extra funny is the its the same process when you read “real news” article ...and you think “this is insane ...it can’t be true”..
the difference of course, is the Bee is satire..and is not real...it’s not real,right?
I had a coworker that loaded his selection with jalepenos, then ate the food with one hand while wiping the sweat off his forehead with the other hand, the whole time muttering "Boy, this is good!".
I think we could use some of that.....
I have a white female friend who orders “Thai hot” whenever we eat at a Thai restaurant. She’s vegetarian but IDK if that makes a difference.
Unless you stretch that definition quite a bit.
“Skip the salt. I don’t like my food spicy.”
Who has the humor bit about the Easterner judgin a Texas Chili-Cookoff? Legendary—but I can’t find it on my computer (sigh)
What about a special “Scoville Scale” for us white folks from the Great Southwest (Arizona, New Mexico, and Texas)?
Once upon a time, I (a white Arizonan by background) served as a substitute cook at a homeless shelter hosted by a Lutheran church .
I made certain dishes as spicy as I normally ate them. But many of our guests and volunteers—including one Hispanic—complained that I made them MUCH too spicy!!!!
There’s no accounting for taste!
May be good for northeaster white people, that think Taco Bell is authentic Mexican food.
Decades ago, during a short stay in North Carolina, was shocked that there was no place to buy salsa.
Catsup is as close as they got.
Habaneros are about my tolerance maximum.
Habaneros are an excellent breakfast fruit.
Diced up in eggs or cornbread......
Who needs caffeine to jump start you.
I grew some Carolina Reapers and Ghost peooers, and they approache being un usable in most of my cooking.
Now I just buy Ghost pepper flakes for a mild boost.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.